UNLOCKED - LANDO NORRIS [Book 3]

31

Settled at the end of Lando's bed, his leg buried in between my own, I lean forward and grasp tightly onto his hand as the doctors and nurses work on all the tubes and machines up near his head. 

Lando's family are standing to the left of him, I refuse to look at them, and Charles is behind me, cradling Peanut in his arms. 

"It's time" Dr Hilton announces as he instructs the nurses around him. Offering a comforting hand onto Lando's parents shoulders before he settles his hand on my own shoulder. 

Cisca approaches his bed, cradling his head in her hands as she bends down to place a kiss on his forehead, "I love you so much, my boy. You've made me so incredibly proud and you will continue to do so for as long as I live. I will miss you more than you will ever be able to imagine, but you go and be free. Go be free from this pain. I love you" 

She steps back with a sob as Adam takes her place, gripping tightly onto his arm. "Forever and beyond son. I'll take care of your girl and your little man, I promise you" his eyes dart to mine and I duck my head away, unable to make eye contact with him. "I'm so sorry I couldn't fix this" he sobs. 

Everyone looks at me, waiting for my goodbyes, but I've already said them. 

At 2am this morning when I snuck into his room whilst the nurses were on change over, I filled the room with promises and vows of our never dying love and the life I'll create for our boy. I let go of his hand and crawl up beside him, settling myself against his body with my head on his chest. "I will always love you" I whisper but I'm not even sure it came out. 

All the nursing staff, bare one, leave the room and the silence that explodes through the room is ear piercing as the nurse switches off the once beeping heart monitor. 

My eyes remain glued on Charles who is fighting back his own tears as he rocks my son gently from side to side. His eyes are on me as he nods his head slowly, filling me with his own promises and strength. 

Cisca's sobs break through the silence and I pinch my eyes shut as tightly as I can to rid myself of this memory. Forcing a blockage that never comes. 

I grip tightly onto the love of my life as I feel his slip from me. 

A heart that only ever belonged to him rips into shreds, half of it leaving with him whilst the other destroys every single last piece of me.