Jobi the poop

2 (in a seagull's nest)

Jobi was now in a seagull's nest.
"Yo," said Jobi, "you got any Kanye up in here boiiiiiii?"
The seagull looked at him. "I've got Nicki Minaj." The seagull player Anaconda on her iPod.

Jobi sighed. "Ew, gross. Anyways, why'd you kidnap me?"
The seagull sighed. "I'm a loner, Jobi. I don't have a life. You're my only friend."
"I'm not your friend," he replied. "I freaking hate you."

The seagull ignored this comment and continued. "Jobi, I'm sorry. You're also here because I have a nest full of hungry baby birds."
Jobi saw himself surrounded with baby birds that looked hungry.
"That's your food!" the seagull chirped.

"I'm literally a piece of poop," said Jobi. "How much grosser can you get than that? Like, really?"
The seagull looked at him in disgust. "Ew, you're right."
The seagull kicked him out of the nest.

**

Jobi opened one of his eyes to see a Spartan standing right in front of him.
"JOBI!" he yelled. "WE LOST A SPARTAN AND NOW WE ONLY HAVE 299! WILL YOU BE SPARTAN NO. 300?!"
Jobi said, "Sure", and he was suddenly in a Spartan outfit.

"LET US KILL THE TROJANS!" the spartan man, Leonidas, yelled at the top of his lungs.
The people started fighting, and Jobi sighed.
"I AM A DISGUSTING, FILTHY PIECE OF POOP!" he screamed, and the Trojans ran away in horror.

Leonidas smiled. "You have done well, Spartan!"
"Wait, where am I?" he asked.
"You are in Sparta," he said. "You will now return to the beach. This never happened..."

|Author's Note|

I'm so glad that it's my last week of hell!

I just have to take 3 more final exams...ugh. :/

Anyways, I hope you like this stupidity called Jobi the Poop, and remember to vote, I guess.

Because this is really dumb, so why would you vote?

What am I kidding?

VOTE, MY CHILD, VOTE!