A Horrific Fantasy

Chapter 19

Meanwhile over in Mystique Hollow that same evening, Levana was helping Vaggie paint another glorious mural on a wall that had been left blank and white. Vaggie was painting moths this time but she didn't want to paint them so perfect like she did the butterflies. She wanted to paint them as imperfect, with lots of scribbles and out of place lines and colors. Sometimes she liked to paint neat and elegant, and other times she liked to paint messy and modern. Basically she painted something however she felt like painting it.

Levana painted moths too but they were just straightforward and perfect. No lines out of place or scribbles. It looked just like something you'd see on display in an art museum. But there didn't to be any emotion in her art. At least not from Vaggie's point of view. Still it was an impressive piece, as impressive as one of her father's paintings.  In fact that way she painted was identical to how her father would paint.

"You're really good." Vaggie complimented. "You know my parents and I used to paint on the walls like this when I was a kid. The house we lived in together was so dull and colorless. basically a run down shack.So we painted different images on the walsl to make it a nicer place to live in. When we moved into the apartment, I wanted to paint on the walls of y bedroom but my mother wouldn't let me."

"Your mother is a very troubled person." Levana said.

"What do you mean?"

"She has a very dark aura."

"What does that mean?"

"Well judging by what you've told me, she's not very happy with the life she's chosen to live. She's not happy being a mother."

"Well I guess it's not easy for her but I don't know about that."

"I'm just going by what you've told me. She never encourages your artistic dreams, she doesn't listen to you, she's never around, she always expects you to just focus on school and nothing else. And you did tell me once that she just wants to make sure you don't screw up your like she did hers. Didn't you say that?"

"Yeah."

"Well I'm no genius, but isn't she basically saying that she screwed up her life by choosing to be a mother instead of going back to college?"

"No...She's not saying that." Vaggie replied, though she wasn't entirely convinced of that.

"Again this is just me drawing my own conclusion on things that you've told me about her. but it sounds like she never wanted to be a mother and that she resents the fact that she had to be one."

Vaggie wanted to protest but she couldn't. She couldn't find anything to say because she didn't know for certain if Levana was right or wrong. She knew her mother was trying hard to take care of her but she wondered if she did that because she loved her or felt that she had to. Vaggie's birth had been an accident and her mom did give up a college education to take care of her. Her mom seemed to always be in a rotten mood recently and she was always acting like the worst thing Vaggie could do was repeat her mother's actions in high school. Did she resent being a mother? Did she resent having Vaggie?

"My mother was the same way." Levana said. "My father was married when she had me and he said that he could handle a mistress but not a bastard. So he left us and she blamed me. Said he'd still love her if I had never been born."

"Oh...Gee I'm sorry to hear that."

"She was an awful woman. She made me feel responsible for everything bad that ever happened to her. As if my existence was a plague on her. What kind of a mother would make her own child feel like that?"

"I...I don't know."

"If I had a child of my own I'd never let her feel like her being born was a mistake. I'd see to it that she would always feel wanted and adored. That's why I'm so kind to all children. So they never have to feel as awful as I felt growing up. I sincerely hope you never feel that way."