BLEEDING HEARTS ☆ liam dunbar | UNFINISHED

☾.˚˖⁺✦[It's Too Late]✦˙⊹˚☽

TW - Mentions of drug use/addiction

Alina sat on the edge of her bed, phone in hand. She felt her heart beating rapidly from nerves while she stared at the screen, her hand shaking hesitantly over the blue button. The house is empty beside herself as Milo is at the station with Parrish, Melissa is at work, and Scott is who knows where. She had nothing to do, she has been sitting on the edge of the bed, tears running down her cheek, her breathing uneven. She is tired, so tired. But she does not want to go to sleep, she is too scared to close her eyes. 

Her pills no longer help her night terrors. She just wants the comfort and calmness that her pills bring to her but without actually having to go to sleep. She itches to reach out to her bedside table and open the top drawer. She knows she should not, but she wants to so badly. So badly. And, there is only one thing that comes to mind that will stop her from this itching need for her pills. 

Alina sighs heavily before pushing the button. She puts the phone to her ear and waits as it rings a few times. Liam's voice comes from the other side. "Hey, Alina. What's up?

"Uh, hey, Liam." Alina feels her body lax.  

"Hi... What's up?"

"Um- I- uh..." Alina sighs, "sorry. I don't know why I called. I just-" Alina hears rattling in the background, cutting her words off.

"Listen, Alina, is it okay if I call you back?" Liam asks.

"Oh, yeah, of course. Call me back later, yeah. Yeah, that's fine." Her heart sinks. Nonetheless, Alina nods quickly, trying to play it off. 

"Okay, perfect. Thanks!"

"Okay, goodb-" Alina does not finish her sentence as the call ends. She pulls the phone away from her ear, looking down at the screen with sadness. She wants to go to sleep but does not want to go to sleep at the same time. This confuses her. She just wants a dreamless sleep but the only time in her life she had ever had a good sleep like that was when she stayed with Liam. But, he is too busy apparently. Alina does not blame the guy though, she just needs to take the hint that he does not like her any more than just a pack member. A classmate even. 

Alina lets out a long sigh, rubbing her eyes. She reaches for her bedside table, pulling open the drawer and rummaging through her miscellaneous items that have been discarded there, however, her hand comes short. She sits up off her bed and continues to rummage through her drawer. Still, she cannot find the familiar bottle. She turns on the lamp to help but once the light illuminates the room, she can see that the orange bottle is nowhere in sight. 

"What the fuck-" she moves to look through Milo's bedside table, then his desk, and then her desk. Alina looked through her backpack and the bathroom cabinets of everyone's bathrooms. "Where the hell did they go?!" She began to panic, and tears begin to fall sparingly from the frustration of just wanting to be able to feel like any ordinary person. She needs them.

She needs the pills.

She cannot even fall asleep without them, what is she supposed to do?!

But maybe she does not deserve to sleep. Maybe she deserves to suffer like this for what she did. Suffering from this pain is her punishment. Or maybe her mom deserved to die. Maybe her mom deserved to die for what she did to Alina for all of those years. But, her mom did not mean to, her mom could not control it. Alina liked to believe that if her mom was able to control it, she would have never done the things she did. Alina will never know though because she killed her mom before she could have the chance to get better, to be better.

Alina stops her search of the bathroom cabinets when she hears the door open downstairs. Someone was home. Alina sprinted down the stairs to find Melissa setting down her purse and keys on the kitchen counter.