DIFFERENT LIFE'S PERSPECTIVE(ON HOLD)

CHAPTER 4

ERIATA ADESUWA AMELIA

I dropped my bag on the couch as my mind drifted off to the panic attack I almost had. One which I had to overcome all by myself, not that I had a problem with it besides I was never one to share my problems.

I glanced at the clock

4:00pm

Well, mum would be home anytime soon. I closed my mind trying to rest even if it was for the briefest moment but of course I had to be disturbed.

"Is anyone home?" I heard the familiar voice of Omonye, my sister but I didn't bother to answer.
"So you are at home Adesuwa and you cannot answer. Where is mum, she was supposed to come pick me up at the airport" she said as she dragged her box inside the house

"Work" I replied curtly
"Why are you behaving like you are not happy to see me. Come and help me carry this box inside joor" she said then I stood up, carried my bag and left for my room while she screamed my name clearly angry.

That was the point. I wasn't happy to see her

Omonye was the perfect daughter. Perfect character, perfect grades, perfect life, everything I was not and that was probably why my parents preferred her to me.

Everytime she was around it was like as if I had disappeared and my parents didn't even spare any attention my way and as much as I hated to admit it, I loved attention.

I slammed my door angrily and I made sure to lock it, not like she would make any attempt to follow me anyways. She didn't give two fucks about my life.

Omonye had gone to KentWood High School and unlike me, she went for the head girls post and got it. She had always been the confident and outspoken one among the two of us and unlike me she didn't do things because she was forced to but rather because she wanted to.

A single tear escaped my eyes, sometimes it was hard to keep up with this strong girl act. Deep down I knew I was the weakest person I had ever known but I will never let anyone see that side of me.

I changed into some shorts, a tank top and a pair of sporty canvas then I carried my phone and airpods and I left my room. Luckily she wasn't downstairs and her box wasn't seen anywhere either. It was like she never came home. I rolled my eyes

Ever the responsible.

I walked out of our gate after telling Mr Kasali, our gatekeeper I was going out for a run. On a norms, I preferred to do this in the late evening time where I would be hidden in the darkness that would help me hide my insecurities.

I was insecure about everything, my looks, my body, my life. I was just a messed up teenager with nothing to show for her 16 years of life. I wasn't good at anything,

I couldn't even be the best at the only thing that people recognised me for. My academics. I always came third, I'm sure if I wasn't Adesuwa the brainy no one would really care about me at KentWood.

The truth of the matter was that half of the teachers only noticed me all thanks to the fact that I was Omonye's sister. Another tear escaped my eyes and I furiously wiped it away as I quicken my pace.

I began to run and that euphoric feeling I got anytime I ran came. I felt so wild and alive like I could take on the world.

I was tired of it all. The pressure to do good, the fake life, the insecurities and sometimes I wished I could just end it all. I slowed down and sighed.

So much for being strong.

I connected my airpods to my phone and turned on my playlist. 'Runaway by Aurora' immediately came on. I loved that song because somehow it spoke to me.

I ran and ran and I didn't know when I began singing along to the lyrics of the song

🎶"But no, take me home,
Take me home where I belong,
I can't take it anymore

I was painting a picture
The picture was a painting of you
And for a moment I thought you were here
But then again, it wasn't true, dah

And all this time, I've been lyin'
Oh, lyin' in secret to myself
I've been putting sorrow on the farthest place on my shelf
La-di-da

And I was runnin' far away
Would I run off the world someday
Nobody knows, nobody knows
And I was dancing in the rain
I felt alive and I can't complain

But no, take me home
Take me home where I belong.....🎶

I ran faster as the lyrics filled my head and a wild grin broke out on my face as I felt the first drop of rain hit my head. I quickly put my phone in the pockets of my shorts as I stood there waiting for the rain to pour out on me and it did.

I twirled and danced, happy. This was what I wanted. Right now I didn't care of the passers-bys that gave me weird looks as they passed. I was in my own world of freedom. I was free....... from myself

I removed my airpods as the song came to an end and I quickly looked for shelter. I found one. I sighed as I rested my head on the pillar behind me and I smiled, this time a sad smile.

Many didn't understand me, no one did but at times like this I choose to believe that God was still there watching me and hearing my silent cries because I didn't want to get consumed by this dark cloud that was forming above my head.

I stayed there and waited, breathing in the scent of the rain. My best type of scent. When the rain finally stopped and it was only a few drizzling here and there I removed my phone from my pocket and checked the time.

5:58pm

I tucked my phone back in there. I smiled once more then I began my walk back home, with every step I took a bit of my happiness seemed to vanish and the familiar heaviness I felt in my heart came back.

I knocked on the gate and it was immediately opened by Mr Kasali. I looked at the car park, mum's Porsche cayenne and dad's lexus RS were already parked in the car park which meant they were home. I took a deep breath, well they came home early, probably to meet their daughter.

I walked towards my 'humble' abode, at least that is what I chose to call it. Have I mentioned that we were rich?

I entered inside the house and I was met with the smell of fried chicken. I heard laughter coming from the kitchen and I stood at the door as I watched mum and omonye converse. Mum looked happier than she had ever been in weeks. I suppressed a scoff and I quietly walked away.

I went to my room, quickly changed my clothes, then had a quick nap, a few minutes later Omonye came to call me

"Your food is ready"

I put on my black crocs and made my way to the dinning table.

They were 8 chairs surrounding the big elaborate dinning table. Dad, mum and omonye sat beside each other.

I sat two seats away from dad. Dad said the prayer and we began to eat, conversations were made here and there and laughter could be heard everywhere but none of them were mine.

I watched them as they laughed to whatever Omonye told them and I couldn't help but notice how they looked like the perfect family

Without me

I stood up in an attempt to leave
"And where do you think you are going to" Dad said and everywhere became quiet
"I'm full. I'm going to my room, I have some homework to do" I lied
"Sit down and finish your food" he said
"Daddy--"
"I said sit down--"

"Honey allow her to go, if she wants to leave then she can as well leave. She isn't even supposed to eat with us when she did not help with making the food" mum spoke up and I used that medium to walk out. Tears threatened to spill from my eyes.

I entered my room and locked the door. I went to my playlist and set 'Runaway by Aurora' on replay and I played it. Tears spilled out my eyes as I thought about it all.
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XOXO💖