HAPPINESS

chapter fourteen

Harry had tried knocking a few times before leaving to his meetings, but I couldn't answer. I couldn't stop crying no matter how I tried. James had also stopped by, bringing me dinner, which I just picked at.

It was midnight now, and I was starving. I grabbed my food and opened the door, heading down the stairs to heat it up in the kitchen. I wiped at my eyes and sniffled, the tears still flowing no matter how much I didn't want them too.

I popped my food in the microwave, and while it was heating up, I walked to the living room, looking over the vinyls. I found the Fleetwood Mac one I wanted and placed it on the record player, dropping the needle on the correct track.

Landslide began playing, and I bit my lip as I heard the front door open. I turned to face Harry as he walked in, his face immediately softening at the sight of me. The tears came like they had been all night and he walked over to me, immediately slipping his hand on the nape of my neck softly.

He rested his forehead on mine, "You didn't deserve that. And I know, he didn't mean it. He let—don't defend him. Please." I interrupted, and he nodded softly.

"Remember what fixes everything?"

"Dancing?"

He nodded, and slipped his hand off my neck and down to my arms, lifting them and wrapping them around his neck. His hands then placed on my waist. We swayed slowly, as he sang softly to me, "Well I've been afraid of changin', cause I've built my life around you."

I felt more tears fall, and he leaned in and kissed each one that fell, until I couldn't help but laugh a bit at the repetitive action, "Harry."

"I need them to stop." He said, as we still swayed softly, the song playing again, still on the loop I had placed.

"He hurt me..." I cried again, I hated the sound that came from me, and Harry quickly pulled me in holding me tighter.

"I know. I'm sorry. You don't deserve that. You messed up, but you didn't deserve that." He said, his hand soothing my back. We kept swaying, not exactly matching the rhythm, but it didn't matter.

"I can't believe I forgot. I feel so horrible. So horrible. I can't even go fix it, because we leave tomorrow. And, I don't know if he'll answer my call. But...I also didn't deserve his comment, he knows..." I broke down crying.

Anthony more than anyone knew, that I hated the life I led. That I hated my job. That I hated that my body didn't feel like mine. That it didn't feel like I owned it. He had lumped me up into the one thing he knew I hated, and it was continuing to break my heart.

And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills. Well, the landslide bring it down.