All Of You// JJ Maybank

7. i lied about it all

FRIDAY NIGHT

I toss and turn trying to sleep. John b and his friends are outside being loud around the fire.

I give up on sleep around 2am and head to my dad's room. I start looking for clues, anything that will help me find dad. There's got to be something that is familiar to me. Something that snaps.

There's things scattered everywhere. And im sute things are missing from those men.
where do I start? "I'm really trying here dad" I sigh. After about an hour of searching and arguing with myself I March out to the fire. "You know the sun's going to be up in 2 hours" I sigh.

"Yeah? It's not like we have school" John b scoffed and sipped more of his beer. Maybe it was my lack of sleep or my feelings being hurt but i snapped. "Are you always going to be pissy with me or-" "im not pissy. Your annoying" he's clearly drunk "annoying?! I was going to offer you help with the gold but forget it" im over his pity party.

"You'd probably just help until we almost got it and then give up on us" "fuck you John b" I walk back twords the house, not caring that his friends just saw the whole thing. "Fuck you bella, no one asked you to come back"

I swollow the hurt and force myself to sleep.

I wake up around 10am. Everyone is alseep in the living room. There's beer and trash everywhere. All the groceries are gone. Dishes need to be done desperately.

I make myself some coffee and head to the porch. I notice all the beer cans and trash in the yard. The grass needs to be mowed again, something i asked john b to do yesterday.

I sigh, feeling defeted. Why am I here? Me being here isn't going to bring dad home and clearly it's not helping John b. I don't know why I thought it would. I came back and fixed everything they needed fixed and I get walked on. I get treated like a maid.

I cant suppress the lump in my throat. Tears start to fall. I walk down to the dock, trying not to wake up John b. I'd never hear the end of it.

I take out my phone and call Cade. "Honey?" "I lied Cade. I lied about all of it" I break down. He talks me down as I try to explain through my tears. "I am so sorry. I didn't want you to think I was a looser and-" "im not mad sweetheart"

"Your not? I thought you'd never wanna see me again" "im alittle upset but I'm not immature. Does this mean you'll let me visit now?" "Please? I could really use you right now" I huff, wiping snot from my face.

"I leave as soon as possible, it'll be late before I get into town though" "I understand. I'll send you the address. Thank you so much for understanding" "ofcourse sweetheart"

"I love you" "I love you too, now go relax honey" his voice is warm. I hang up and continue to cry on the dock. "Are you okay?" Jjs voice comes from behind me. I whip around to see him, clearly half asleep.

"Im fine jj" I wipe my face dry as if it wasn't also bright red. "Bella-" "just leave me alone" I stomp past him, bumping his shoulder on the way. He follows me to the house and to my room. "Im always here if you need to tal-" I close the door in his face. Where was that attitude when john b told me no one wanted me here?

I curl up in bed and cry for what feels like forever.

~time skip~
I'm not sure when I fell asleep but I'm woken up to knocking on my door. "Hey bella..." Its John b. "Could we borrow some money? We're gonna go grocery shopping since your not feeling well" he says gently.

Not feeling well? I wonder if jj said something about me crying. I pull myself out of bed and twords my wallet. I pull out a hundred. When I open the door john bs face softens before he clears his throat.

"Thanks" he nods. "If you come back with anything we don't need, I'm never giving you money again" I sniffle. "Im sorry about what I said" "than-" "but it's true, no one asked you come to town. You just showed up and expected us all to treat you like a saint" he said this in a soft tone which almost hurts worse.

"Your an ass" "im apologizing?" He looks offended. "Cade is coming to town. He's gonna stay for the night" I say with no emotion. "Can't wait to meet him" he makes a fake excited face.

I close the door and crawl back into bed. My phone has 2 missed calls from Cade

New messages: Cade 🩷
Cade 🩷: im leaving now
C: just tried to call. Hope everything's okay
C: if you changed you mind about me coming please let me know
C: im about an hour out of town. We should grab dinner
C: im gonna guess you sleeping, I hope your dreaming well. I'm about thirty minutes out, hopefully you told your brother about me so he'll let me in.

I give him a call. "Hey, I am so sorry" I cringe once he answers. "Its okay. Are you up for some dinner?" "Sure but I need to get ready. I'm a hot mess right now" "hottest mess I've ever seen" he lets out a low laugh from the other side of the phone.

"How far are you?" "About 15 minutes. How about you hop in the shower and we'll talk when I get there?" "That sounds perfect" "i love you" "I love you too"

I wash my shame away in the shower and try my best to put myself in a good mood. I'm still in a towel when there's a knock on the door. I peak around the corner to make sure no ones home.

"You can come in" i yell. He follows me to my room. Before I can say anything he's searching the walls for old pictures of me, ones I refused to show him.

I pick out some distressed shorts and a teeshirt that hangs slightly off my shoulder. When im in my underwear, Cades focus is no longer on my wall.

"There's no rush, right?" He smiles, holding my waist. He kisses me in a way that tells me exactly what he wants. "Cade" I whisper as he kisses my neck. "Its been so long since you've let me touch you like this" his hands grip my ass. I haven't exactly been in the mood since hearing the news about my dad.

"Cade my brother and jj are going to be home soon" I lightly push his chest. "I can be quick" he wiggles his eyebrows. "Cade please" I huff. "Okay- yeah I understand" he nods lightly.

I want to feel good tonight. I pick my tightest, ass hugging ripped jeans. I was a looser tank top that cut sort of like a muscle top that shows alittle of my bra. I slap some basic makeup on my face and curl my hair.

"Babe it's just a bar" Cade kisses the side of my face. "I know but I've looked like trash since I got back, it feels good to dress up alittle" I force a smile. I cant imagine all the people I'll see from high school. I have to look like I glowed up at least alittle.