Just Leave Me For Her||Zhongli x reader

Chapter 14

"Do you know why he didn't look back?" 

"Why are you asking me this? Why not anyone else?" 

"You mean why not him."

"..." 

"I don't want to snap in front on him. I don't want to break in front of anyone I can hurt. Better to do it here, and if this doesn't do the trick, in some unknown domain that I can crumble in." 

"He- He didn't say much about you except for what he tells everyone. He didn't like talking about you, not even to me." 

"Ok... Next question. Was your first kiss with him the day he left me?" 

".....Yes." a gasp of pain and a dry sob and then a scoff. Guizhong knew this was a string snapped. 

"Of course, he wanted you so bad that he didn't even try to hide it." 

"He- he was ashamed though. He felt guilty..." Guizhong rushed to defend him. 

"Only answer my questions." the voice that came out was one that was tired, weary, one that would welcome and be glad for death's embrace. 

"..." 

"Alright. Now, did you have any children?" 

"No.... but I suppose you already knew that." 

"You're right. He did tell me. But I'm not sure whether or not to believe anything he says to me." 

"He never lied to you." 

"He never lied... never lied." hysterical laughter. "HE never lied to me? Don't lie to me too. Do you know the number of times that he told me that everything would be alright? Do you know how many times he told me that he would love me forever? What a lie. What a stupid dream I was living." 

"It was paradise for you though." 

"Maybe the old me. I don't remember. I don't want to remember." 

"Why not." 

"Why do you think?" a grin from you made Guizhong shiver. 

"How many threads do you have now?" 

"I'd say around three. They'll all snap when you answer this..." You got up, readying a teleportation spell that would activate when you sank to you knees or fell down. 

"What?" 

"Was he happy? Happy with you? Happy without me? Was my sacrifice not in vain?" for a moment, Guizhong swore she could see the old you again. Your voice had quieted. You almost looked sane, but then she answered.

"Yes. He was happy." you could feel two threads snap. 

"That was only two. Anything else?" You were back to being broken. You had expected that answer. 

"Why?" 

"Why not? Why shouldn't I? I'm not essential to this world. I'm just a burden aren't I?"

Guizhong reached out and grabbed your hand. 

"I'm just made of the happy memories he made with me. When I show you this, I'll disappear. Tell him goodbye. Tell him to be happy." 

"I can't." 

"That's alright. He already knows." 

Suddenly, you felt warm. Looking into Guizhong's blue-gray eyes, you became lost in a field of memories. 

When you came to again, Guizhong was gone. You now knew. Knew everything about their relationship. It was from Guizhong's point of veiw. It was like you had experienced it first hand. Even the moments after she died and he visited her. 

You looked at the last memory. 

You yelled into space. 

"Why did you make me hope! Why Guizhong! He doesn't love me! So stop!"

That was the final string snapped. When it did, you fell. 

A flash of light. 

Then a cave. 

And a mechanism. 

A perfect place. 

How am I still alive? 

Well even if I'm still alive, I know I'm not sane. 

How long has it been?

A month? 

Two?

Why is there a change?

Lumi?

Xiao?

Who are their friends?

Lumi saw you and rushed over. 

"Y/N? Why are you here? Zhongli said you've been missing for a month!"

"How long has it been?"

"Two months since Zhongli last saw you." 

You looked at Xiao. He read madness in your eyes and pulled Lumi away. 

"Thank you Xiao. Lumi, just stay away. I'm not alright right now and I will never be again. Why just rot away in this place, better if I just get you out and bring my end nearer." 

You walked up to the mechanism. 

It was already pulling everyone up and Xiao was putting more and more of his energy into it. 

Then, you saw it. 

He was going to sacrifice himself. 

He was going to get everyone else out. 

He saw no worth in his life. 

"No!" You quickly pushed Xiao out of the way and teleported him out. 

Everyone else's eyes widened. 

Then, you fell. 

Closing your eyes, you whispered. 

Dear Lumi, 

Don't cry for me dear. I'll be alright. Don't try to find me. Don't try to get me out. This is the ending I've always wanted. This is what I want. Otherwise, when I break even more, without my sanity holding me back, someone I care about will be forced to kill me, and I don't want that someone to be you. If I do survive, promise me. Promise me you'll end me. 

Dear Xiao, 

You shouldn't think so lightly of your life. I saw what you were going to do. It wouldn't have been worth it. I hope, I hope you find happiness. Don't miss me too much. I already asked Lumi to kill me if I live, but you'll help her won't you? This is my last wish for you. 

Dear Childe, 

I'm dying. Or I will. The old Y/N you loved is already gone. I hope we meet again in another universe. There I will love you. There, both of us can be happy. 

Dear Venti, 

I'm sorry. I never reached the happiness you desired for me. Thank you. Thank you for doing all that you could for me. If I come back, and no one can or will slay me, do it yourself. Please? 

Dear Morax, 

How can I still love you? 

Well, goodbye. 

Goodbye...

My love..

A/N: CLIFFHANGER!!! whooooo! No Morax won't save you. More and more and more angst. I haven't updated here in a while. I was working on my other book. Anyway... brace yourself for more angst. Maybe a surprise character? Idk.