Wingless

Chapter twelve, unsure

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When Sky finally woke up, he did so with a smile.

Yes, he was still sick. Yes, he knew the nightmares didn't stop for long. Yes, he still had wings. But somehow, waking up with someone next to him made him feel so much better. Especially when that someone seemed to really care about you.

Sky looked at the clock, 11:36 it read. He gaped at it in horror. He never slept so late. Yes, it was the weekend, thankfully, but still. Then, thinking about it again, he dismissed the thoughts.

Instead Sky looked at Prapai's sleeping face, and couldn't help but stare at his handsome features. That man was -Sky hated to admit- absolutely gorgeous. Sky did not know what made Prapai take interest in him, but he was happy nevertheless.

Sky however, no matter what his emotions and heart said, did not fully trust Pai yet.

Yes, - he sadly admitted - he loved this moment. He wanted to stay here forever. In the arms of a man who cared -or pretended to. But Sky knew he couldn't.

So, Sky, not bothering to be careful, hurriedly stood up.

Unfortunately, he almost toppled over as his feet hit the floor.

Pai, somehow waking up at exactly the right time, caught Sky by the arm, not letting him fall.

"You're still weak.." Prapai mumbled, voice groggy from sleep.

Sky huffed, pulling on his annoyed face.

As Prapai himself jumped to his feet, he tried to help Sky walk, but the other just pushed him away.

"Don't." Sky said

"Uhh, meanie!" Prapai said with a whine "Pushing me away after I'm no longer useful, huh? Last night you clung to me like there was no tomorrow, and now?"

Sky blushed and smacked Pai on the arm, hard. With the help of medicine, some of his strength was returning.

"Let go." He said anyway, looking stern, like a father asking a kid where all the candy went.

Pai let go, but put on a sulky face.

Sky ignored it and left for the bathroom.

As Sky closed the door behind him, he took off his shirt. Sky turned to the mirror, examining himself. He was well build, not too much muscle but not weak either. Sky didn't notice that though. What stood out to him were the three giant scars going diagonally over his chest. These scars where not the only visible marks Gun had left on him that night three years ago, but they were the only thing people would notice without looking too closely. Sky also had bruised nipples, as well as a few scars over his wings, but Sky had been able to escape Gun before his wings got any further damage. Sky always made sure not to change in front of other people, wanting to escape any questions. Even when he did have to change in front of others though, -yesterday for instance- he usually wore an extra thin shirt under his regular clothes.

Sky carefully trailed two fingers over his scars.

"Appear..." he whispered and his back immediately felt under pressure with the extra weight of his wings.

Sky studied his scars and periwinkle feathers, and looked back in the mirror with disgust. He knew he shouldn't break down when someone was still in his condo, but sometimes, things like this were way too much. Usually when things became too much, Sky went flying. True, he did only when the sky was cloudy, to make sure nobody saw him, but he did enjoy it. He blamed it on the aches his wings had after long periods of not flying, but the truth was, it was actually really comforting.

He hoped the day would be over soon so he could just get in the air. He hated this feeling of being trapped, just like -ironically- a bird in a cage. He knew this was not even close to being over though, so he told himself to be strong, averting his eyes from the mirror.