I Wish [ManxMan]🦂

DRAY~09

Natalia pulls me into a nearest corner, not far away from the eyes of people, But far away from Steve. I can still see him even though I cant see his eyes. 

I adjust my clothes. Playing in my head what she is about to say to me. Apologize? Pleading to let them get married? Or is she trying to say that this marriage is just a sham and a game for Weston to be seen as a married man.

That she is being a good friend and I fucked up getting entangled with Steve.

But what left her mouth, left me speechless.

“What did I expect from you anyway? You have been after Weston for four years and now, you couldn’t get him, you go after another man the moment you get. And on his wedding day? Are you that fucking desperate? Is all this just for revenge?”

“ Hello to you too Nat, long time no see.” I play along. Taken aback by her words. “but last I checked, he nor you are not the center of my life.” My heart is pounding. I could hear it in my ears.

“Yes he is.”

“Nata-,”

“No, fuck you Dray. This is my wedding day. And what the fuck are you doing here anyway. I didn’t want you here. I made sure of that.” She raises her voice. Drawing some attention to us. Last I checked this was a small town and people gossip. I can't do this.

I won't do this.

“Well, your so-called fiancé invited me. Over and over, did i say over? Oh yeah and over again.” A chuckle escapes me. I didn’t expect this reaction from her. What is she doing? If she is trying to hurt me then, I don’t even want to think about that.

We have been friends for so long. Was that all a lie? A twisted game to her?

“Yes he did. Because he wanted you to know that he is marrying me. That he won't give you what you want. He will never love you enough to come out to his family, not even for you Drayton, so if I were you, I would give this pretense up and go home. God what's wrong with you?”

“No Natalia, what's wrong with you?”

“Nothing is wrong with me, I am getting married.”

“Ah, I see. So what?”

“What?”

“Yes, you are getting married and no one is denying that. So what? Why are you so angry huh? No one is saying otherwise. I mean I just came with my date to enjoy my best friend's wedding. What is wrong with that?” my words drip with sarcasm. I let them.

She looks at me like I have grown a second head. Her frustration building up. She swallows. Finding words to say but failing miserably. 

Weston walks to us. Instead of standing beside her, he comes to my side. So close I can smell his perfume. 

It disturbs my senses and somehow I can't help comparing him to Steve. Weston evokes nothing in me while Steve evokes everything. Peace. Love. Desire. Lust. I look at Weston, trying to find a good reason why I fell in love with him, but I don’t see any.

Maybe I needed a person at that time. Maybe I just picked him. But we had our moments. Goods and bad and in those moments, I truly loved him. I loved him with everything I had,

Until I didn’t.

Until he broke my heart.

But even then, I loved him. I loved him until all my love was spent, and I had nothing left to give.

He took everything from me and now, I am empty.

Except I am not. I met someone who filled that emptiness with something new in just a couple of hours. And now I have hope again. I have something in me that not even Natalia nor Weston can take away from me.