A Clean Pair of Eyes

10: Olive Branch

ERIC

I was under the Charger, trying to figure out what the fuck I was going to do about everything going on. Working on cars was my method of meditation and I was stressed as shit. I wasn't prepared for anything that was happening in my life. I tried to keep it together on the outside. I felt like I was doing a pretty good job of it. I wasn't sure if it was the baby that was bugging me anymore or if it was the fact Madi was moving out. It wasn't something I thought I'd be facing so soon. Not that I'd be facing grandpa-hood.

I had to figure out if Madi getting pregnant so young was something I did wrong as a father or if it was the just natural progression of life. I knew the logical answer to that. I hated it either way. Josh was a good kid. I wouldn't have been building him a car if he wasn't. Stepping up and selling his truck so he could buy a family car was proof of that. At least Madi picked well, mostly. He would be a hell of a lot better if he wasn't Sookie's son.

I was trying with her. I really was. I still wasn't sure what I thought of her or if we could be friends. I knew for the kids' sake we had to try. I sent her the message about the car just to see if she was at all interested proving to the kids we could get along. I knew it meant a lot to them that we tried. She wasn't my favorite person, but I didn't hate her. I wasn't sure I ever actually hated the woman. I did respect her. She knew what she was talking about, usually. For some weird ass reason she thought I didn't know what I was doing when it came to cars.

I wasn't going to worry about Sookie. I'd be around her when I had to be. Until those times I wasn't sure I was going to try so hard. It wasn't about Sookie anyway. It was about trying to figure out the right thing to do for Madison.

I smelled coffee, surprisingly over the smell of oil, and rolled out from under the Charger. Gracie was standing there with my World's Best Dad mug.

"Hey, kid," I said, sitting up on the dolly. I hadn't had a chance to talk to her about everything going on.

"Hey. Thought you might be thirsty."

"Thanks." I took the coffee from her. The shop had been closed for close to an hour. I was surprised she was still around. "You doing alright?"

"Yeah, I'm okay. Madi's over at Josh's house."

"You should have come to get me sooner," I said. I took a sip of my coffee and let out a quiet groan. Gracie and I were a lot alike, including the way we liked our coffee.

"I didn't want to bother you. I know you're busy."

"Not too busy to hang out with you," I assured her. I felt like I was putting too much focus on Madi and leaving Gracie out. I didn't like that feeling very much.

"It's okay, Dad. I know you have a lot on your mind because of Madi. I just hate going home by myself. I'm not good at being alone," she said.

"I'm sorry." I knew she wasn't. Gracie and Madi both had issues being alone. It wasn't fair to Grace that Madison had Josh. It probably wasn't a matter of what was fair. It was just different. "I'll wash up and we can go have dinner, if you want."

"We don't have to. I can just sit here and watch what you're doing," Grace offered.

I stood up from the dolly and took another drink of my coffee. "I got a better idea. Come with me."

"Oookay." Gracie followed my lead.

I put my arm around her so we could walk out together. I didn't want her to think I hadn't been thinking about her. I did, all the time. She was my little peanut. She weighed a full pound less than her sister when she was born. Even though they were identical, Gracie had always been a little smaller. Height and weight-wise. She was the quieter one of the two.