Ishq-e-Watan

Chapter 47- Tangled

CHAPTER 47

TANGLED

Monami ran her fingers over the glass lightly. Her mother's smiling face stared back. It has been so long since she had seen that smile now. It has been so long since she has seen her. Her eyes slid close.

Monami trembled. She crawled closer, her lip wobbling. Her eyes welled up with tears and she felt a sob escape her body. There was a hole in the middle of her forehead, her dead gaze staring unseeingly upwards. 'Mumma', she whispered. She reached out, touching her cheek. It was cold. 'Mumma! MUMMA!'

Her eyes snapped open. The photo slipped from between her fingers, bouncing down on the bed softly. She looked down. Her fingers trembled slightly, as she picked it up. She kept it aside, swallowing slightly.

"Monami", a voice said. She flinched. The person kept a hand on her head, and she looked up. Faizi? "Kya hua?" He asked. "Tum theek ho? Ro kyun rahi ho?"

She reached up, touching her cheek. Her fingers coated with wetness. She brushed it away. She shook her head. "K-Kuchh n-nahi. Bas..." She looked down at the photo. "Bas... Mumma ki y-yaad aa r-rahi thi."

Faizi looked down at the photo. "Diwali ki wajah se?" He asked gently. She paused before nodding her head. "Tumhe baat karni hai?" She shook her head adamantly. "Agar akeli rahogi, toh aur yaad aayegi. Aa jao, hum sab ke saath aa jao."

She paused, before nodding slightly. "Aa-Aap k-kyun aa-aaye the?"

"Bas ek file rakhne aaya tha", he said. She stood up, and he gently touched her back, almost guiding her out of the room. He eyed her. "Tum raat ko dhang se soyi nahi kya?"

She looked up, blinking, almost startled. "Uh, woh... n-nahi. M-Main s-so g-gayi thi." She glanced down, fidgeting her shaky hands. Faizi glanced down at them. She tensed slightly, a lie at the tip of her tongue, but he didn't comment or question.

She had slept. That part wasn't entirely a lie. Seeing Param had unsettled her more than she had anticipated though. Her night had been riddled with nightmares, each worse than the last until she had eventually given up at around 3 in the morning, sitting down at the edge of the window and staring at the moonless sky. Sanju's soft, even breaths in the quiet of the night had done little to soothe the fear and panic that lurked from the nightmares and even as the hours passed from late night to early morning to almost noon, her dread had only reduced marginally.

She glanced up when Faizi pushed open a door. The other two trainers looked up from their spots- Sanju sitting on the boys' desk and Karan settled on his bed with a laptop on his lap- and their eyebrows furrowed in concern.

"Monami", Karan said, keeping his laptop aside and standing up. "Kya hua? Tum kaamp rahi ho."

She looked up at him, opening her mouth. Her throat constricted slightly. His concerned eyes bore down into hers and that perhaps, only served to push her closer to her edge. She took a shaky breath, offering him a small smile in hopes to appease him. It didn't. Instead, he looked over her head at Faizi. She tilted her head back, watching the two silently. They seemed to have a conversation but Monami couldn't understand either side. Karan nodded.

"Coffee? Tumhe peekar achha lagta hai, na?" He asked her. She opened her mouth again, only air escaping her. She was still panicking. Silently, dryly. She pointed to his laptop. He glanced at it, and then grabbed it. "Mess mein kar lunga kaam. Aa jao." She nodded, following him out. If she could form words, she would perhaps object- she didn't want to pull him away from work- but no matter how much she seemed to try, only air seemed to escape her. The more she tried, the more panicked she got. This feeling reminded her of a similar one- years past- but it was just as unpleasant.