Main Character Syndrome (Senku x Reader) Dr. Stone

The Idea of Talking

Monday

Many things happened today, and I couldn't get myself to understand them. After getting out of the laboratory, I went straight home. Listening to music, I tried to understand his behaviour and my own emotions. Suddenly, I feel so emotionally numb. It wasn't my fault that something like that happened. Heck! I'm getting through something painful, and he only cares about his experiments... On the other hand, he always adored experimenting. For example. He even went to steal that cart from little children's backyard. That was actually fun. And when he forced you to join science club. I was so angry, but I would have never met Oreiro. She and I started to talk recently, and I think I can actually find my place in a lab. Wait... Does that mean that I'm not supposed to go there anymore? It sure will be awkward, and what about Yuzuriha and Taiju? They'll hear about this whole thing and will stop talking to me. The fact that everything that gave me happiness is disappearing. I should make new friends, right? But I've just made them... And lost them. Everything is changing again. Yes, it is painful, but what can I do? Nothing! Crazy right? Think I'm losing it. Tomorrow will be better.

I suddenly feel guilty...

Tuesday

Here we go! Oof. We are having a problem here. Sitting on your chair in a class while having math is somehow frustrating. He is not talking to you. What does he think? What do they think about you right now? Suddenly, you feel your leg shaking under your desk out of stress. You stopped and looked around and saw everyone focused on their work. Isn't it stupid how everyone is just minding their business and not giving just a glance to others and trying to do something. How selfish can teenagers be? Nyoko? She has Rykuu. Rykuu? She has everyone and even Goku. Goku, your first boy friend and the one who you went to the library with? He has whole drama club and girls. Science club? Oreiro has her friends from 2nd year. Yuzuriha? She has Taiju. Taiju has Senku. Senku has honest and true friends without trying. That's so unfair! You always tried, and now nothing? "Miss (L/n)? Are you even focused?" That annoying math professor asked. "No," you answered bluntly. "Is something more important outside the window?" "Huh?" "Miss. I'm trying to have a normal conversation with you," he suddenly became more irritated. "Well, I'm too trying. And nothing," you said with venom in your voice. "Calm down, miss," he laughed, "My class is not a place for zoning out, so if you want to keep disturbing me... You can just leave."

Wednesday

What now? I feel like everyone knows it. They for sure know I'm alone. Oh, what would I give to not feel this way. Ever. Again. I will smile more on people so they feel better. I will study more. I will be more polite. Stop competing with him. Try to understand him- others more... I will... Just, please, give me my true friends back. Or at least him. I hadn't spent much time with him, but it was fun. Now I know it. I want to experience more of it. Maybe if I weren't, so mean things would be better. Now, when I look back, I shouldn't have been so mean. And if I could just change what I said!

Thursday

Ifs, woulds and should-s. Stop with those imaginary stuff. It happened. So it's time to finally live the reality. No more of it. He is still not talking to you, and so you need to face the reality. How are you supposed to fix this without being ignored? After these three days, you actually calmed down and are willing to think of a plan. Now that you are aware of your mistake, it's time to stop with your emotional thinking and start to do something. Bargaining no longer feels like an option. And that's good 'cause next week your class and class 1-A are going to a school trip to Kyoto! Great chance for socializing. But that would be weird. Maybe he- they- some people will think that the loss did nothing to you and may think how easily you are replacing them. Today, Oreiro asked if you were better, and you told her not to worry. You feel it's getting better, but the feeling of the loss is still there. And then the loneliness hits again. She was just asking because of you obviously not coming to lab anymore. That's the reality.