Beauteous

Chapter 45

I yawned and let Stellar order for me. Kahit na ayaw nila akong bumalik sa trabaho dahil sa mga issue na nangyayari, I know I have to appear. I don't want them to see that I am losing in these controversies. I mean.. I am not the loser here.. Kahit manahimik pa ako.

My lips thinned when I saw Trina here in the building. I can't be mad at her.. She doesn't know that I am in a relationship with Stan when we caught them.. And the blame is all on him. My anger for him is unwavering and undying. All I can feel towards him is hatred for his own existence..

He really fucked my whole life. Noon man o ngayon. But unlike before.. I will never push my self to accept that it is my fault because I am unlikeable and an abomination. It's always been his fault. Playboy and a fucking cheater.

Trina smiled at me. Hindi ako ngumiti kaya nawala ang ngiti niya at nagmadaling maglakad.

“Kapal ng mukha..” bulong ni Chimmy.

“She don't know anything,” sabi ko sa kanilang dalawa na mukhang iritado.

“What if she does? Nagsusupetsya nga siya sa inyo noong nasa Amanpulo,” si Stellar, inabot niya sa akin ang strawberry flavored ice cream.

“Hayaan niyo na lang, I want peace..” ngiti ko sa kanilang dalawa.

“You know, you will never have peace.. lalo na't marami pa rin namang bumabagabag sayo..” sabi ni Chimmy sa akin.

I sighed heavily. She's right. Pero as of now.. I don't want any shits anymore.. Mabuti nga at hindi na ako umiiyak.. It's been a week. The issues are slowing down, kakaunti na lang ang mga taong nag eentertain ng issue ko. It's a good thing..

I've never heard anything about Mommy. Sabi sa akin ni Tita Shaina ay susubukan nilang hanapin at kausapin si Mommy.. I told them yesterday that I am pregnant.. They are my family now.. They asked who's the father, I told them that it doesn't matter anymore.. Since it was never in our plans, or his plans to have a kid. It just happened. And I am the only one responsible for this life inside me. No one else. Not even the father.

“Kailan mo balak magpa check up?” bulong ni Stellar sa akin. Kumakain kami rito sa cafeteria ng merienda, inaantay namin matapos ang meeting ni Mrs. De Dios bago kami tumungo sa kanya para sa new schedules..

“Kapag nakapag paalam na ako kay Mrs. De Dios,” sagot ko sa kanya at pinagpatuloy ang pagkain ng ice cream.

“Hindi pa naman halata ah..” si Stellar at sinundot pa ang tagiliran ko ng paulit ulit. Natawa ako sa ginawa niya.

“I don't want everyone to notice it before I leave, mas suspicious..” sabi ko sa kanilang dalawa.

“Sabagay.. Wala ka pa namang boyfriend, sobrang suspicious talaga..” tawa ni Chimmy.

“Wala ka ba talagang balak sabihin 'yon kay alam mo na...” mahinang sabi ni Stellar. Ngumisi ako at umuling sa dalawa.

“I don't need him in my life, Stell.. All he ever did was to wreck all of my build up strengths and ruin my life..” sagot ko at inubos na ang ice cream.

Masaya ang tyan ko sa tuwing kumakain ng strawberries.. Mukhang paborito ng nasa loob ng sinapupunan ko..

I was raised by some nannies before. My own Dad, malayo sa akin. I have no warmth of parents. Minsan ay katiting na sinag lang.. I wanted a family. I needed a family. Pero ngayon.. I have my own family now.. My long lost relatives.. There's Chimmy.. Iris and her family.. And the baby inside me. They are my family now..