- Tamara Myers -
I don't feel like getting out of bed today, I just can't do it. I'm a pretty confident person and I'm definitely not one to let other people influence my opinion of myself. But for some reason, this day in particular I feel like a burden. Another year since my dad passed away.
The thing is, I didn't really know my dad. Or have many memories of him because he died when I was really young. But I do remember how happy he made my mum. Which makes me sad because I'm a constant reminder that he left my mum behind. I have his face, his personality, I even have the same interests that he used to have.
Used to have. Before he died.
Not only am I mourning the loss of my mum's best friend, but also the man who could've taken me to my prom, who could've given me advice on my first boyfriend, threatened to beat him up if he hurt me, knowing full well that he couldn't hurt a fly.
I wanted to know what he was like, not through old photos, but to have seen him walk me down the aisle one day, or meet his grandkids. I'm mourning a man I never got the chance to know, and the fact that I was robbed of the chance.
From beside me, my phone rings - it's my mum. I haven't got the heart to face her, but because of the time difference, I know she stayed up so we could talk. That's one thing I love about Laura Myers. Despite me looking so much like him, her love for me never wavered, and she supported me in everything I did. So I owe at least this to her.
"Morning mum." I greet first, but we both know it's half hearted.
"Good morning Mara, how are you feeling?" She asks, but I hear her voice cracking while she asks.
"Mum, we don't have to do this. How are you? Honestly, no sugarcoating."
She lets out a dry laugh, "No sugarcoating?" When I hum in confirmation she begins to sniffle, "I miss him Mara. I don't know how I've gone so long without him. It's been years, I should be able to smile and remember him as this amazing husband and best friend and father. But all I feel is sadness for someone who got taken away too soon. You didn't even get the chance to know him well Mara. You would've loved him."
I don't even realise that I'm crying until the hot tears fall onto my thighs. "I'm sorry mum. I'm so sorry that he's gone, that I look so much like him. I want to go home, go back in time. Anything, I'm so sorry."
"Mara, listen to me." Her crying stops for a moment, "don't you dare apologise for anything. None of it was our fault. There's no need to feel guilt, take the day off and I'll call Mabel to let her know. We can arrange to meet up during the holiday or something. Don't abandon your dreams in a moment of sadness, okay?"
She truly is the best, "Yes ma'am." I laugh, but this time it's real.
"That's my girl. I love you, and so does he, okay?"
"Love you too mum." I end the call shortly after and change into more comfortable clothes sitting back in bed. My phone lights up with a message from Kai.
K - Hey, are you free to continue the presentation today?
T - sorry, I'm not feeling to great today. Maybe tomorrow?
K - Are you ok? Any reason why you're skipping class today? Mabel seems quite bumbed out that you're not here.
T - if you miss me, just say that. I'll be fine x
If he sends me another message, I don't see it. Turning my phone off, I switch the light off and head back to bed.
*****
A little sad chapter, but that also means there's room for comforting! I sincerely apologise for this chapter but there won't be any sad chapters after this one!
Hope you enjoyed this chapter, comment and vote if you did.
Have a great day and see you at the end of the next one!
- Coco <3
YOU ARE READING
Myers
רומנטיקה"Believe it or not once upon a time you couldn't stand me." "I wouldn't say that. You were just to confident for your own good." "You were just playing hard to get...." "Really? You stood no chance." "But I got you in the end, didn't I?" ...
