Celestine

fourteen // jungkook

I know she's nervous, I can feel it. Even if I couldn't, it's visible. She's got that nervous habit of gripping onto something. For less than a minute she grips onto the armchair. But as an experienced actress and public personality, Célestine's doing an incredible job.

And the cheers are so loud – people love her. That's... an easy way to say it. They are obsessed. No, for real, why are grown up men yelling so loud for her?

Not that it bothers me.

Maybe a little bit.

Anyways.

She looks beautiful, but not like Célestine at all. I think I got used to the hood and the joggers. Now, she's wearing high heels, black wide-bottom pants and fitted white long-sleeved shirt with buttons. She'd pull off everything, to be honest, but there are things that make her... either Tina or Celestine. Tina's elegant and almost sophisticated. And she looks so right now. Célestine is wild and unpredictable. The pink hair holds onto Célestine.

The host, Jessica Ronald, asks her, "Any highlights of the break you've been on? I'm sure you did some pretty amazing stuff."

I grin to myself. We did do some cool things together.

"The best part of my break was spending time with my friend. We did have a lot of fun," she says. My lungs tighten. Is it possible for my smile to get wider?

"Can we get a sneak peek into some of them?" Jessica asks, leaning closer to Célestine as if to make it a secret.

"Simple," she says, crossing her left her over her right thigh. "Tones of great food. I've never eaten so well before as I did on the break."

"Really? Can you recommend us some places everyone in LA must try at least once?"

It's coming, isn't it? A laugh bubbles in my chest before she answers, and as Célestine says, "Probably everyone in LA knows it already, but if you haven't been to jeon's kitchen, you're missing out on the best Korean food in the city," I burst out laughing.

Célestine's interview ends twenty minutes later. Not even five minutes after she leaves the set, I get a text from her.

Célestine: I was waiting for that opportunity

Grinning at my phone, I text her right back.

Me: People will flood my place now, I need more cooks

Célestine: no one's ever gonna be better than you

Célestine: I can't stop thinking about your cherry brownies now *crying emoji*

Me: say a word and they are ready ;)

Me: btw, you did great even though you were nervous

Célestine: how'd you know I was nervous?

Me: I could literally feel it here

Célestine: okay, I was nervous

Célestine: thank you :)

Célestine: I thought about you most of the time, it kept me calm

Warmth washes over me at the last text.

"I thought about you all this time, too," I mumble, but don't put it into a text.

As Célestine texts she's gonna get back home now, I text her she can come around if she wants to – I'd make us some food and she could relax after the draining day.

Without waiting for an answer, I mute the TV and bring my laptop onto my lap. Even through the screen I could tell just how big and excited the audience was.

I'm curious what people say. Despite knowing how famous she is, I've never been the one to engage in online discussion about it. I've enjoyed the movies and shows she appeared in, read the interviews with her out of pure curiosity, and that was all.

But I want to know now. Now that I have a wider picture – what people expect from her, how she feels about it, how anticipated her comeback was.

It's not hard to find things about Célestine online now. Every gossip website, every news website, every website that talks about celebrities, every social media platform is full of her. "Tina Cartier is making a comeback". Everyone – a host or a fan – is talking about it.

Some people are ecstatic, some complain it took her so long. Whatever they say, she's in the world's spotlight tonight.

I don't think I've ever realized how famous she is. Or maybe I forgot about it, because all this time I was with Célestine, not Tina Cartier.

This is the level she's on. This is the level my dreams are at. This is the level I have to reach, too. If I want to achieve any of this, if I want things between us to grow, I need to step up my game. Even if she quits one day, she will always be talked about. She will always be Tina Cartier. I can't let them talk badly about her in case, one day, she'd be seen with me.

Whether I want to reach that kind of fame or not doesn't matter. My dreams are at my fingertips, and I will do everything not to let them get too far away again.