Pessimistic [Completed]

The Rewrite

Its been about a year since I was writing this, and I recently reread it.
And it really sucks. Sorry.
I'm not back in the fandom, but I really want to rewrite this for those of you that are, and also to shut my perfectionist brain up.

The rewrite will likely have:

-longer and better plot, including more chapters

-more description

-better written emotions

-more attention on the negative parts of not having a home or steady food supply for ELEVEN YEARS

-better written romance and angst

-more fluff moments so its not just "haha we're dating now we're over"

-better flowing and more realistic dialogue

-better written friendships, i have now had more experience with having friends

-less grammatical issues. The original mistakes weren't very noticeable but now I have another year of english under my belt.

-longer paragraphs, maybe. Ill try to stay on subject longer

-better written arguements, not just
escalating quickly and then stopping

-better written trauma

-things that were randomly and obsessively focused on at certain moments will be more spread out

-better representation of an emotionally abusive mother and absent father

-possibly a lime of sorts (not for fan service, but to further Pico and keith's intimacy)

-probably not that whole thing where keith gets kidnapped by the police.

-less Darnell abuse because I'm pretty sure I did not actually have a legitamate reason to do that to him

-no soft keith, because man what the hell was that

-a better last name for Pico because I
accidentally named him after Pico de gallo

-(trans keith maybe- hehehe im going to shove some representation down peoples throats)

-more throwbacks and references to the title

-a renewed book cover

-more characters from the original game, not just mentioned in passing

-changes in how I represented corruption- and making them more noticable, bzzing instead of numbness, etc

-less cringe authors notes

-and more!

I'll be putting the link here once I start publishing it:

Thank you!