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april 12, 2015
[jjk]





the first time i ever saw you, all i could think about was how adorable you looked. you came over the day we moved in, wearing a jean blue colored cap and plain black swim trunks. you were slightly sweaty, but you didn't seem to mind the heat like i had at the time. did i mentioned how flustered i was when i realized you were shirtless? i remember the flutter i felt in my stomach, and i realize now that that was the moment i knew i was gay, and the moment i had felt the feeling of liking someone for the first time.

you took the box i was carrying and said you could carry it inside for me. i was surprised you could carry such a heavy box at your age, but i guess you've always been naturally stronger than i. i remember i kept asking you questions and i'm sorry but i was just so eager to be your friend.

you looked at me weirdly, but i didn't mind because you were looking at me and i enjoyed looking into your brown eyes.

you kept bringing boxes into my house, insisting you could carry them by yourself.

i didn't know it was because you didn't want me lingering around. i didn't know you didn't like all my comments and questions.

i guess i was a bit annoying back then, but i couldn't help it.

you were just so pretty, it made me nervous.

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