His Sweet Addiction (BTS ff JJK)

Chapter 46

"Sweetness, I need you to take better care of yourself. You can't take risks like that because if you die, then I think I would too." They could both hear the desperation in his voice as he tried to make her understand.

Maddy sighed. "Jungkook, I can be more careful. I'm sorry I made you feel like I don't care if I live or die, that isn't the case." She paused because she was pretty sure he wouldn't like what she was going to say next. "But, you can't say that if I die, your life is over. People die every day in a million ways. People get hit by a car or get ill or have random accidents. You know this, you've dealt with loss." 

Maddy's thumb tried to rub away the frown that had formed between his eyebrows. "We can't control everything that happens. I promise you that I will try to be more cautious and I hope that makes you feel better. But my cancer could come back at any time, or I could slip in the shower and hit my head and be dead or something else. We can't live in constant fear that someone we love will die, because that isn't really living." 

Jungkook's frown was back but Maddy continued, "I want you to tell me that if I die, you will be okay. Tell me that if some terrible thing happens to me, you will go on living. And you will find new friends. And you will continue to play soccer and will try out for the track team and you will go to college. You have to promise me that you will live on, Kookie."

Jungkook shook his head and his tears started to fall again, "I can't Maddy. I can't say that because it isn't true."

Maddy had a reprimanding tone now, "You have to, Jungkook. I can't be friends with you, knowing that if my cancer comes back, your life will be devastated. I know you would be sad, and you would go through mourning. But I need to know that you would be alright in the end. That you would go on living. Tell me that you would try or I don't think we can do this anymore. It is too much pressure on me. I can't feel like I can't love anyone because if I die, it will devastate them. Say the words Kookie. You have to, for the sake of our friendship."

Jungkook eyes were still leaking tears. If lying to her kept her as his friend, he would do it. He wished he believed the words he was about to say. "Alright I promise to try. I promise that if you die, I will go on living. I'm not sure I could be happy ever again, but I would really try to be."

Maddy cupped his cheek, "Thank you. I promise to be more careful. I will try not to be reckless."

"Thank you Maddy."

Maddy smiled then, "Kinda funny that I have to promise to not be reckless when you and your brothers are the ones who go out causing trouble. Don't you think you should also be making a promise to not be so risky?"

Jungkook got a little smile then, "I already told Jimin I'm not causing trouble with him anymore."

Maddy patted his head, "Good boy. So, no more fighting at all, right?"

Jungkook knew he still needed to deal with the guy with the knife, but after that, he had no intention of getting into random fights. He decided not to mention his plan to Maddy though. He'd already lied once, he didn't feel like he should again. He tried to word his answer in a way that was mostly truth. "Unless I'm protecting someone I love, I won't fight anymore."

Jungkook buried his face in Maddy's shoulder again and breathed in her scent. He wrapped his arms around her and rolled onto his back so she was fully on top of him. Maddy scooted down and rested her chin on Jungkook's chest. "I'm glad you came over."

He gave her a squeeze. "Me too." Jungkook started thinking. "Tell me what the American said and what you were yelling at him."

Maddy went through the night's events not leaving any details out. Jungkook understood that the American, Royce, did recognize them and was planning to attack them with knives once they were out of the tattoo parlor. He also understood that all of Maddy's risky behavior was to protect him and his brothers. His guilt returned.