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Do I want to go to Europe with four guys I haven't seen for the last two years? Bailey is unavailable for the entire summer, I saved enough money, I am legal. . . But I really don't want Ashton or any of them to pay for my expenses. I want to go, but at the same time, I don't want to. I want to go because I get to spend more time with them and actually have a memorable break and I don't want to go because I might be left out because they're closer to each other than they are with me especially after they left Australia. And I might see things that I don't want to see.

These thoughts ran through my head as I took a long shower. It was only a little past 5:30 am when I got back home. The house was quiet and dark.

I let the warm water relax me, inhaling and exhaling. I do my usual shower routine until I saw the morning sun shining from the window, lighting up a part of my bathroom. It was now 6:30am when I finished. An hour.

-

I asked my parents about the tour and they surprisingly said yes and told me that they'd give me my allowance when they come back home later as long as I promised to call them often and come back home in one piece. So I called Ashton. He was beyond excited and immediately told the other three. We arranged a hangout in a nearby Maccas so we could plan all the things (fun things) we're going to do.

Then, Luke sent me a text.

From: Luke

since when did you run? :-( especially with ashton?

To: Luke

don't be sad, luke. Ash and I are just friends.

From: Luke

Ur probably just saying that so I dont feel bad :-(

To: Luke

Of course not

From: Luke

:-(

To: Luke

:(

From: Luke

Can I at least come over?

To: Luke

Sure

I put my phone down and waited for Luke. Then, I heard my phone ring again and answered it. Luke said he was already outside so I told him to come in since I was still tired from my run.

Luke entered my room and almost tripped. I stifled a laugh as he regained his balance and just glared at me.

"Hey." I greeted.

"Hey." He said and sat down beside me.

"How's it going?" He asked.

"Same old."

"Okay." He answered.

"What about you?" I asked. This is weird.

"Good." He answered.

"Okay."

An awkward tension began to rise and I found it stupid. Ashton and I are just friends and I think I also made it clear to both guys. If I did like Ashton, I wouldn't be sitting here with Luke. I wouldn't be making out with him whenever we're together, showing him that I still love him. I wouldn't be doing any of that if I liked someone else. But I don't.

"You really mean that?" Luke asked, a shocked expression with a joyful smile covered his face.

Did I just say my stupid thoughts out loud?

"Mean what?" I dared to ask. I just needed to make sure because I'm feeling beyond embarrassed right now.

"You wouldn't be spending so much time with me if you liked someone else and you still love me." He answered in a soothing voice.

"Um," I gulped. "Yeah."

"Promise?" He asked and I rolled my eyes.

"I promise. God, Luke, do I have to call Ashton and tell him too?"

He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me close.

I smiled and nuzzled closer to him, inhaling his scent. "Stop being a jealous fucker."

He chuckled and kissed the top of my head. "You're actually going on tour with us." He said with a smile on his face.

And we still aren't fucking dating.

****

Not a really good chapter but I hope it was nice....somehow

5 chapters left + an epilogue so stay tuned because again is coming to an end (awwwww :,( ). Expect a lot of updates this week bc I plan to end this before April ends

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