Read to me ~ Xingyun

19

Tw// mention of abuse, blood

Xingqiu POV:

I stood there in shock, what had just happened?!

What did he do to Chongyun?

Why was there broken glass?

Why was there so much blood???

All these thoughts and questions were overwhelming, this whole situation.. just.. everything.

I couldnt move, I couldn't even cry, all I could do was stand there like the pathetic faliure I am,

I couldn't save him. No. I didn't even try to save him. This is all my fault.

I dont remember much of what happened after that, I remember my father yelling, Shenhe coming home, she yelled too, everyone was yelling, I think she hit him... Good. He deserved it. Everything was blurry and suddenly the police showed up and I got in an ambulance with Shenhe and Chongyun, the sirens were loud, I think Shenhe was talking to me? When we got to the hospital one of the nurses took Chongyun away, a police officer took me away, they took me into a room and started asking me questions, I couldn't talk, I couldn't say anything and I don't know when but apparently I had started crying at some point since the officer started comforting me, they wiped my tears and told me everything was going to be ok, but realistically it wasn't, I wanted Chongyun to be the one telling me it was ok, to be the one wiping my tears and hugging me, but he couldn't, he was in hospital with glass in his head.

Suddenly everything hit me like a truck, nothing was blurry anymore and it seemed I had come back to reality. There were police officers talking in front of me, the background noise of the hospital came flooding into my brain, I could feel my tears, there was a lot. There was also a stabbing pain in my chest that had been numb up until now.

"Excuse me, young sir, are you ready to answer us now?" One of the officers asked,

I cleared my throat and took a breath,

"Yes. Sorry."

They asked a lot of questions, like if my father had a history of abuse, if he had ever hurt me, they asked about what I had seen happen, if Chongyun had attacked him first and of course I told them he hadn't, my father hit him first,

Then they asked what weapon was used, truthfully I wasn't entirely sure, I think it was a vase of some sort?

After the questioning they let me out and Shenhe gave me a hug,

I wanted to see Chongyun, where was he?

I asked a nurse and they said I cant visit him until tomorrow, that was too long away, I needed to know he was ok now. I needed to apoligise now. I needed to see him Now!!!

But I couldn't, and Shenhe took me home, well to her house, I wasn't allowed to go to my house, Not for a long time.

In the car she kept telling me she was going to keep me safe, strangely, I wanted her to look after me, I'd always wanted a mother like her..

She apoligised for not being there sooner, she told me she would protect me. Chongyun had said that too, And he kept his word.. but at what cost?

I just wanted him to be ok.

When we got back to the house I went up to Chongyun's room, nobody had cleared up the blood and glass yet.

Shenhe told me to go and sit in the living room as she cleaned it up but I felt bad having her clean up my mess.

I sat on the couch, staring at the wall blankly, I was thinking about how maybe this could've been avoided if I had answered the door, or if I hadn't run away in the first place. Or if my father had never come home in the first place.

Shenhe cane downstairs and told me I could go up to bed if I wanted, I went up to the bedroom and lay on the bed, I looked next to me at the empty space Chongyun usally filled and I felt my chest get tight, I grabbed the pillow he slept on and cuddled into it, it smelled like him at least, I lay there in the dark room, curled up in a ball with my face stuffed into the pillow, eventually I fell asleep, today had been exhausting.

And then I woke up.

Alone.