Tribulation [h.s]

32

"Further apart, the closer that we are
I'll keep you far away, from me like a star
Hard not to fall for you."

-

The water is warm against my skin. A floral aroma – lavender and rose – fills the space around me and pleasantly stains my skin. I sink further into the tub and let my body go slack after being taught for far too long. My mind begins to clear, and I can almost breathe clearly.

I can't remember the last time I relaxed.

I mean- the bathroom door is wide open, Frozen is playing on the TV at a ridiculously high volume, and Maggie keeps running up and down the hall screaming and laughing while playing with Cheddar; she's specifically dragging a red string across the carpeted floors and Cheddar can't help but chase it.

I close my eyes and slump further into my warm bath. Five minutes. I just want to enjoy myself for five minutes...

"Maggie, can you quiet down for a little bit and lower the TV?" I wait and wait, but Maggie falls silent. Too silent, and for a six-year-old, that's never good. I sit up straighter in the tub. "Maggie, what are you-" I cringe at the loud thud I hear all the way in the living room. She fell, didn't she?

"I'm okay!!"

My eye twitches. "Maggie, lower the TV!" I yell out to her. My patience is wearing thin right now.

"Okay!" She hollers back.

But of course, the volume of the TV gets even higher.  Oh, I'm definitely getting a noise complaint from my neighbors today. "Maggie!"

"Sorry!"

I roll my eyes, and then I let myself slip under the warm, floral-scented water.

Raising a six-year-old is exhausting.

When I come back up from under the water, the volume to the TV is significantly lower — thank god — but Maggie is up and running around again in no time.

Finally, it's quiet enough for me to ease into a state of relative peace. I begin humming to myself – an off-tune of an old lullaby I used to sing while rocking Maggie to bed as a baby.

Somewhere over the Rainbow – a song engraved forever in my memory.

Ah shit.

I can't stay mad at Maggie for long at all, can I?

I sigh, head thunking against the ceramic of the tub. I hear the pitter-patter of little feet, a sound that makes me smile. Like I had expected, Maggie stumbles into the doorway of the bathroom. She's breathless from all the running, and her hair is wild and disordered. "S-Someone's knocking at the door." She announces.

My eyebrows furrow. "Okay. Just ignore it."

"B-But they're calling your name. Is it one of your friends? Can I let them in?"

"No," I shake my head. "Remember what I told you about opening doors for strangers?" She pouts before nodding slowly. "I didn't invite anyone over, and if it was Julie, she has her own key. She would have walked in already. Whoever it is can come back later if they really need to. For right now though, I want to enjoy my bath, okay?"

"But-"

"Just ignore it. Whoever it is will walk away eventually."

Maggie stares at me for a long minute before blowing a raspberry. "You're no fun, Als." She wanders off with a pout, little Cheddar in toe. Those two are inseparable. She talks to that cat about everything. She also asks him her ranging existential questions. My favorite question of hers was 'what is the universe?' Their conversations are are one-sided, of course, but I swear he understands with the way he gazes at her.