Just a Little Kindness || JiLix slow burn

4.

After the interview, Jisung stayed in his room for the rest of the day. He didn’t come out to eat, work, or attempt to make conversation with members. He knew as soon as he saw them, he would spiral into an attack and he didn’t want that. As Hyunjin said, he was just dramatic, right? In all honesty, Jisung was starting to think he was right. Jisung was starting to believe everything the members had told him. He was annoying, useless, dramatic, stupid. Useless…

There was soon a knock at his door. He ignored it at first but the knocking got louder and wouldn’t go away no matter how much he tried to block it out. 
“Come in,” He finally said. 

When the door opened, he saw Felix standing there. He didn’t come in, just looked at Jisung. Jisung wasn't exactly surprised Felix was just staring at him. He had himself curled into a ball in the corner of his bed with his blanket wrapped around him. He had his phone in his hand and was just scrolling through it. 

“What do you want?” Jisung asked him after a minute of silence. 

“Why are you just huddling in the corner of your bed?” Felix asked. 

“Why else?” Jisung said, his tone was a bit snappy but could you blame him? 

“Right...well, I just wanted to check on you,” Felix said quietly. 

“Don’t give me that bullshit. You said I should stay away from you. Here I am, away from you. So you came here for a reason. You wouldn’t want to go to someone you had told to stay away from you. What’s the real reason you’re here?” 

Felix was silent for a little while, just staring at the ground and fumbling with his hands. Eventually, he pulled a box out of his pocket and threw it to Jisung. It was a Tupperware container, it was small enough to fit in your pocket but big enough to put a small portion of food in. After throwing the container to Jisung, Felix shut the door and left. 

Jisung stared at the container on his bed for a little while before deciding to open it. When he did there were three of the brownies Felix liked to make. One with nuts, one dark chocolate, and one white chocolate one with milk chocolate chips. They were small ones, but they were something. Jisung was honestly surprised that Felix bothered to come to his room and never mind give him something. It confused him even more considering the words Felix had said in that interview. 

Maybe they’re poisoned… he thought to himself as he looked at the brownies. 

He just put them on his nightstand. Poison or not, he didn’t want to eat anything. He appreciated the gift, but the brownies most likely wouldn’t be eaten. His stomach wasn’t exactly cooperating with him at the moment. 

Jisung didn’t sleep much that night, and when the next day came he groaned when he saw the sun rising through his window. He stayed in his room that day as well. He had already finished his recording and had nothing to do, and besides Changbin and Bangchan said they were going to take his part out entirely so there was no point in doing anything about it. He didn’t care anymore. It hurt at first but now he just didn’t care. 

He could hear the others getting up and heading to the dining room after an hour of him laying there. He didn’t move from his spot, though. Another hour passed and Jisung just listened to the footsteps of his members walking past his room. Before, he would get anxious whenever they passed his room, but now he didn’t care. He knew they wouldn’t bother to check on him. 

I could be dead right now and they wouldn’t know.

His eyes widened at the thought. He never thought like that and it was strange for him to do so now. But the more he thought about it, the impulsive thought wasn’t exactly wrong. 

They wouldn’t care, would they? Even if they did check, it would be only to keep their conscience’s clean. They wouldn’t check because they care about my wellbeing. 

Again, the impulsive thoughts he was having were right. He didn’t really want to think like that, but he couldn’t help it. What was even worse was he knew it was true. They wouldn’t care. They would never know if he had dropped dead on that floor right then and there.