Son of Night and Daughter of Stars

Chapter 40: The Awakening

Nyx sat beside Amandla's bed, his leg bouncing up and down as he counted her pulse. The same as yesterday, and the day before. Sighing, he dropped her wrist back onto the blankets. He stood and began pacing, running his fingers through his hair as he walked. 

"Please, Amandla," He muttered to her as if she could hear him. "I need you to wake up. I need at least one thing to make sense here. Please." 

He couldn't sit still. He didn't bother trying. It wouldn't work. Instead, he crouched to rest on his feet with his knees bent to be at Amandla's level. "Please, Amandla, I am begging you. Wake up. Find a way to wake up. Lady Westfall says you are the one keeping yourself asleep." He paused, trying to think of what to say to her. "Is it me? Are you avoiding me?" 

He waited, not really expecting an answer. She didn't give one. Her chest continued to rise and fall steadily, her mouth parting with every breath. Nyx sighed and wrapped his arms around his knees, still balancing on his feet. 

"I suppose I deserve your silence," He muttered. "I deserve a lot of things. But you--" He hesitated, wanting so badly to say this when she was awake but needing to get it out now, while his restlessness demanded it. "You deserve an apology."

Nyx cleared his throat. "Amandla, I am so sorry. I didn't mean any of it. I didn't mean for my words to make you so unsure of yourself you ended your own happiness. And I know you were happy. Anyone could see it. Artemis could see it. You-- you love her." A lump formed in Nyx's throat. "I know you do. You were brave enough to show it to everyone." 

He still remembered the day he'd found out about Amandla. His mother had sent him to the Valkyrie camps to deliver a message to the Valkyrie Triumvirate. He'd been leaving when he'd seen Amandla walking toward Artemis with obvious purpose. He'd never met her before then, had only seen her at training a few times. So when he'd seen her walking towards his cousin, he'd assumed a fight was about to break out and had quickly followed. 

Instead, Amandla had interrupted Artemis's conversation and taken her face between her hands. He'd never forget the words she'd said, a continuation of whatever argument she and Artemis had probably been having for weeks. 

"You're right," Amandla had said. "I am scared. But I am not a coward." 

Then, much to the surprise of everyone watching, she'd leaned forward and kissed her. Nyx still remembered Katra shouting from beside him, the wild smile breaking out on her face as she watched her sister grin and kiss Amandla back, laughing. 

I envy you that bravery, His mind whispered without his consent. He blinked, surprised at himself. He supposed he did envy Amandla her bravery, her unbending will. He'd never had the courage to pursue things as she had. Even with... 

No, he wouldn't think about that right now. Not when she'd made it so obvious she did not return the feelings he felt whenever he looked at her. The feelings that, he now realized, had begun to patch over the holes in his heart he'd so carefully guarded, knowing he deserved every one. 

Nyx slumped to the ground with a thump, his shoulders barely reaching the bed now. "Please, Amandla. Please wake up. I need to do something right here." 

Amandla did not move. 

-----------------------------------

The Valkyrie could hear him. 

The Son of Night. Nyx. Her love's cousin. He was apologizing. For what? 

Oh, she realized. He believed this was his fault. Silly male. As if an arrogant Illyrian could have swayed her trust in herself so much. No, she had a much greater enemy. One who'd known the value of the heart she'd held in her hands. 

Break her heart. Smash it into smithereens. If you don't... we shall kill you. Then we shall kill your love, The Queens had said to her. And then all your love holds dear in the world. Or maybe we'll mix the order, so you can see the havoc we'll wreak. 

The Valkyrie hadn't believed them at first. Hadn't wanted to believe she was important enough to warrant their attention. But they didn't want her. They wanted her lover. 

So the Valkyrie had had no choice but to obey them. She would regret it for the rest of her life. But it wasn't like she'd had any other choice. 

Not with the Something slowly taking over her mind. 

That day had been the first test. The Queens had forced the Something down her throat, into her bones and her blood. Her sense of smell had been the first to go. Then taste. Then the Valkyrie had begun to lose feeling in her fingers. It was only then that she'd staggered after her lover, to try and explain, to apologize for what she was about to do. 

She had prayed with everything in her that her love would realize something was wrong. Would sense that it was not her voice, not her choice, never her choice. But she'd greatly underestimated how much a broken heart could sway all common sense. 

I hate you. The words rang, day and night. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. She knew her lover hadn't meant it. Knew, deep down, it was only rage and pain and broken trust speaking. But that didn't make it hurt any less when she'd had to watch as her lover slowly turned from rage to cool indifference, to watch as she was in pain. 

And then the Queens had returned. Congratulated her on completing her task, though she'd done no such thing. It was all the Something's doing, not hers. But they didn't seem to care. 

Her sight had finally vanished when the Queens had cut open her arm, dipping their fingers in her blood. 

Not the Blood of The Sworn, They'd hissed. But you'll do. 

The Valkyrie didn't know what any of it meant. She was so tired. So very, very tired. 

Any day now. The Something would take her life any day now. It already had everything else, here in the dark. And the Valkyrie wasn't glad for it. She didn't want to say goodbye yet. But it would be such a relief to finally rest. 

And then, lying there in the dark, she saw it. 

Light. 

---------------------------------

Nyx's head shot up at the sharp intake of breath beside him. He jumped to his feet, his mouth falling open as Amandla blinked up at him, her lips parting. 

"Nyx," She whispered, voice hoarse. "Where am I?" 

Nyx could have sobbed with relief as he began shaking, guilt and regret and joy spilling out of his eyes. "Oh, Mother above. You're awake, Amandla." 

Amandla blinked at him, her ice-blue eyes flashing in the sunlight from the window. "Where am I, Nyx?" 

Nyx leaned forward, grinning as tears streamed down his face. "Terrasen. You're in Terrasen, home of Queen Aelin Galathynius." 

HI I WOULD JUST LIKE TO ACKNOWLEDGE THE FACT THAT CURSEBREAKER AND FIREHEART IS ALMOST TO 50k VIEWS AND CURRENTLY HOLDS THE NUMBER 1 SPOT IN THE HASHTAG "sarahjmaas"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHICH HAS 916 SPOTS!!

Ok listen I'm well aware that's not that great of an accomplishment but I'm proud of it all the same okay? :)