A Mailbox Of Letters | ✓

| FIVE |

"Loved you yesterday, love you still, always have, always will." – Elaine Davis

All I thought of was you the entire day yesterday.

It was the way you spoke to me that had my chest feel like it was on fire, the way your lips formed words that I had yearned to hear from the first time we talked. I could hardly believe you talked to me for the second time and I was half frozen in time.

But alas, a girl can freeze. Especially this one.

Dad wasn't at home today but I did find a little note taped to my door and I was confused. He usually left me a little to have a good day note on the fridge but why did he tape this to my door? I read the little note before my mood got dampened. It was my birthday in a few weeks actually and Dad had to go to Chicago for an important meeting.

I wasn't expecting much for my birthday, I just wanted to stay with my Dad and hang out, maybe feel that hollow part of me fill up at least for one night on my birthday. Feel like maybe our father-daughter relationship isn't totally gone.

Those hopes got dunked into the water even before my birthday was near to be counted on fingers.

Amelia immediately proclaimed that she would take me shopping and we could have a sleepover at her place when she heard about my Dad's note. Neil agreed with her saying that it would be an awesome sleepover party but I declined.

All I wanted to do was to curl up and grieve for my mother that day. Everyday, I walked to her room and laid in her blankets, relishing her remains before I walked out with a heavy heart. All I wanted was love from someone other than Amelia, as selfish as that sounded...

You walked into school with Kayla today. I felt even more terrible and I could feel tears bubbling up inside of me and I yanked my locker open and shoved my face inside.

I couldn't - wouldn't let anyone see how much life affected me.

You were almost there to the end of the hall as I clenched my eyes - silently praying you made it past me quickly - when you called out to someone.

"Hey!" You repeated twice and I facepalmed as I cursed the person you were calling to turn around and acknowledge you. I was still contemplating to try and run or stay still when a finger tapped me on the shoulder.

Confused, I turned around with skeptical eyes only to be met with your gorgeous eyes. My eyes blinked swiftly like you were a mirage that would fade away like fog if I blinked harder.

"Hey, you okay?" You asked me as my eyes darted to all those eyes staring at us, especially that burning gaze of the girl on your left arm. Kayla's eyebrow sculpted up as she observed me snobbily.

"Can't you talk? You were fine yesterday."

"Yes, um I was just, uh, nevermind." I said awkwardly, my anxiety skyrocketing as you studied me intently. I couldn't stand it, I couldn't stand the attention and I slammed my locker shut, startling everyone.

"Sorry, I'm running late. I should go."

I expected a weirded out expression but all you did was nod and smile that smile that never failed to melt my inside into mush.

"Sure, see you later. But hey wait, what's your name?"

You called out as I sped away, my long hair hiding my pink face as I scuttled away. I ran away before you could get an answer I wasn't sure I was willing to give.