Malicious // h.s. [Editing]

Chapter 9

There could be a million reasons, or maybe nothing specific at all, but it kills me inside to think about how I will probably never know. I may never get the chance to know what he is thinking or what he was thinking when each crime was commited. And I will most likely never be aware of the feelings he has built up inside of him.

Harry walked back into the room many minutes later. His face was completely blank, as it had been before, and his whole demeanor still seemed different. He seemed to be in his own trance, his own little world where it was only him and his thoughts, his most likely very dark and corrupted thoughts. He looked at me as if he was surprised to see me here, as though he forgot that I even existed. All of a sudden something flashed in his eyes and he turned from his calm and drained self to some other person I had never seen before. His gaze hardened on me and his jaw clenched, his hands being brought into fists at his sides as I saw him dig the heels of his feet into the floor, trying to keep himself in place.

"Get up and go eat! I worked hard in there to cook somethig for you and all you do is sit there like a hopeless little ninny!" He snapped, his face turning red from the anger he was trying to hold in but failed to do so.

I stood from my seat and rushed by him, careful not to let my arm brush against him. I sat down at the table in front of a plate of pasta and started eating slowly as he entered the room. I had no idea what caused his sudden outburst but I do know that I do not want to witness anything like it again. I will try my hardest not to do anything to cause that reaction. I'm not sure what I did to make that happen but I will be extra consious to not do it again. Sitting on the couch while he cooks is now a major no. Though I am confused as to why..?

I finished eating as quickly as I could as he stood there and watched me intently. It was making me extremely uncomfortable and I needed to get away from his gaze as soon as possible. I put my plate in the sink and turned to look at him, waiting for him to say anything.

"You can do whatever you want, you don't have to go back to your room. Just don't get into anything you're not supposed to, don't snoop, and do not go into any of the rooms with closed doors. Got that?" He instructed. I gave a short nod. "You speak to me when you are asked!" He snapped.

"Sorry. Yes, I understand."

"Good. I will be out of my room later."

Then, he turned on his heel and left the room, a door closing from somewhere else in the house. I stood in place for a minute before I shook my head to myelf at his change in attitude. His mood swings really give me whiplash and I don't know how much longer I can put up with it.

I walked out of kitchen and down the hallway in search for the bathroom. I have been so disorientated the past few hours and I am having trouble remembering where everything is. I finally found the correct door, which was opened, and stepped inside while shutting it behind me. Harry told me not to enter any closed doors and I know that I should obey his orders because I do not want to find out what would happen if I didn't. Though, his instructions do make me a tad suspicious as to what he is trying to hide, I do not push the topic at mind any further because it is a well known fact that a murderer has plenty of secrets to keep.

I finished using the bathroom and washing my hands before standing in front of the mirror over the sink. It was so hard to recognize myself now that I looked completely drained and stressed out. The dark circles under my eyes made my skin look very pale in comparison, and my lips seemed to have lost all colour. My eyes were dull and my hair looked frayed and unmaintained. I looked like a whole different person. I sighed before something caught my eyes on the side of the mirror. A piece of paper sticking out of the corner made me realize that it opened up into a cabinet. My curiosity got the best of me and I opened it up, the paper fluttering to the floor. I bent down to pick it up, letting my eyes scan the contents of it once I was stood up right again. As I read on, the words became more and more clear and eventually I knew what it was. It was schedule of the times when Harry is to take all of his medication. I wasn't sure what that medication was but it must have been something important if he needed to make a schedule to ensure that he would take it at the right times.

I sat the paper on the counter before scanning the items on the shelves. Multiple pill bottles were arranged on them, ranging from Advil to Tylenol to aspirin. There was hand cream, deodorant, cologne, and then finally a prescription bottle came into view. I grabbed it in my hand and brought it up to my face, reading the small printed lable out loud.

"Carbamazepine," I mutter and furrow my eyebrows. I knew exactly what it was as soon as I spoke the words. I studied drugs in health class and this was one of the most common mood stabilizers for people with bipolar disorder. It is one of the most prescribed pills by doctors for bipolar patients. (That's probably not true.. It probably is not the most common.. But just pretend it is lol)

That's when it clicked. The mood swings, the sudden hatred or sympathy, the way he suddenly snapped at me earlier. Harry is quite literally bipolar. I wonder if his doctor knows that he is also a psychotic murderer that has sociopathic issues.

Fear started to settle within me all over again at this newfound information. If he is diagnosed with this condition, it is a sure thing that he will always have unstable mood sets. He will always change his mind and attitude and with his violent tendencies and behaviour, this could be even more dangerous for me. He could just snap one day for no apparent reason at all and just decide to kill me becasue of all of the anger he has inside of him for other reasons I am not aware of. I shuddered at the thought.

I am snapped back into reality when I hear a door slam again and Harry's heavy footsteps pound against the floor. A loud knock erupted on the other side of the door and I jumped from the sound, not expecting him to come to the door. The pill bottle fell from my hand and the top popped off, the little capsules scattering on the white tile of the floor.

"Darien, are you almost done in there? I need to take a piss," he asked and I could hear the discomfort in his voice as he waited in the hall.

"Uhh.. yeah. Just- just hold on," I stuttered, panic rushing through me. I bent to the floor, gathering as many as I could and trying my best to not miss any. I crawled as quietly as I could and tried to hold in my scared whimpers. I can't believe I was stupid enough the knock every single pill onto the floor. What if he fucking counts them and I missed one? Oh god.. I d-

"Darien! Hurry the hell up before I piss my pants," he hissed. I shut the bottle and stuffed it back in the cupboard before flinging the door open. I smiled at Harry as he raised an eyebrow at my flustered state and brushed past him before rushing to the living room.

I wish I would have noticed his medication schedule still sitting on the counter before I left...

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Finally updated! Thanks so much for putting up with the wait, I really needed the break that I got. I have been very stressed out lately and I think it did me good to just not focus on my stories for awhile. Plus, it gave me time to come up with some ideas. Please please please vote and leave a comment! I would really like to see your thoughts on this one because I put a lot of time into it. Thanks so much loves xx <3