Scout's Honor (AOT X Male Reader)

4 - Regrets

A few days had passed since the....incident....had occurred. Y/n had been living in the forest in solitude. He had plenty of time to think about his next choices. But that's not what he would think about. Y/n was stuck thinking about how he had let his new family die. Y/n blamed himself for their death's. If he hadn't been "special" and took his shower outside in the river. This entire situation wouldn't be possible. He decided never to take a shower outside again. Y/n was thinking about what he missed out on. About what his life would be like if his family didn't die when he heard footsteps coming near him. He got his blades ready. Y/n had gone and got his gear again. He had nothing to do so he decided to retrieve his gear.

??? - Y/N!!!!! COME OUT ALREADY!!! I KNOW YOURE SOMEWHERE OUT HERE!!!

Y/n observed the man come u nearer and got ready to swoop down and strike. Just as he was about to however he saw the man. It was Grisha.

Y/n - ..........why are you here.

Grisha - Y/n. What happened wasn't your fault. Stop blaming yourself for it.

Y/n - ..........

Grisha - Your too young to take on this burden. Please come home. Carla and I would gladly accept you. Eren and Mikasa would be more than happy to have you.

Y/n - She's doing well I see........Mikasa.

Grisha - Yes. She worries about you. A lot.

Y/n - She shouldn't. I'm the reason her family is dead.

Grisha - I told you. This isn't your fault.

Y/n - ...............goodbye Grisha.

That was the last thing Y/n said as he flew away with his gear. Y/n decided to go see his other family. He had been thinking about this for a while now and finally decided to go through with it. It was a long journey but Y/n decided to go anyway. He needed to see someone anyone. Levi, Farlan, and Isabel. The last people Y/n thought he could confide with. But before this Y/n decided to go to the ocean. He wanted some time in solitude. It had been about half a year at this point since he arrived in Paradis. He decided to remind himself how horrible the world was. Y/n thought that the journey filled with titans that would try to eat him would remind him of how cruel his life was. 

Y/n - That's a titan huh..........disgusting.

Y/n didn't care that they were like him anymore. He didn't feel bad for titans anymore. He used to feel terrible for his fellow eldians who had been turned into some horrible monster. After seeing how inhumane his "fellow eldians" could be in a place so peaceful compared to his original home, all that empathy he had for them was gone. As for his gear he had come up with a clever way to to refill his gas. And used his titan crystal for blades so he wouldn't waste the originals. He used his healing factor to refill the gas tanks. While it was steam that came from his cuts he compacted the steam in order for it to have the same effect as gas. But either way he didn't really use the gear to get around. He made most of the journey in his titan in order to gain proficiency with it. He used his odm to kill titans however to train his human body. He had perfected the art of titan slaying. Levi had shown him the ideal way to move in his gear. It involved spinning to gain momentum and Levi told him about a way to move which allowed you to slash while still moving and carrying momentum. Levi had only told Y/n about it since Levi himself couldn't pull it off yet. Y/n decided to attempt it and it worked out for the most part. All of a sudden Y/n saw a small group of titans in the distance and decided it was the perfect opportunity to try out this skill.

Y/n - Five huh. This could be bad if it doesn't go well. I might be forced to transform.

Y/n - HEY YOU BIG DUMBASSES OVER HERE!!!!!!!!!