Just For Show (EDITING)

Chapter 36 - " 3..2..1..."

" where are you going?" I asked after her.

" there was an accident" she said in a quieter tone as she grabbed her car keys off the living room table.

" with who?" I continued to push her for further answers.

She finally looked back at me. Her eyes were still sparkling.

" your father" she whispered.

My whole body froze in that moment. I felt like I forgot to breathe. I forgot how to process things in my mind. I forgot how to react in a situation like that.

" I have to go" she repeated.

" we'll go with you Mrs Reed" Niall suggested.

" no, you two stay here" my mother demanded before shutting the front door in our faces.

I didn't run after her. My feet were still glued to the floor. I could feel Niall trying to tug at me but I wouldn't buge. Suddenly I felt myself getting picked off my feet. I looked around ad saw Niall carrying me to the living room couch.

" talk to me" Niall begged.

" what's going to happen with my dad, Niall?" I asked as if he knew all the answers to the questions inside my head.

" I don't know Cai" he confessed as his fingers brushed my brown hair.

I hugged Niall and stayed that way for what felt hours. Eventually the sleep got the best of me and I passed out in Niall's scrawny arms. The next couple of hours I didn't really dream. To me it was just thinking in my own unconsiousness.

I was so wrapped up in my own little world that I didn't realize that this could have happened to me, to my family. My family had always been so together. But I felt it inside me that this accident would change things. I just didn't realize that it would change everything.

*

I signed my name at the bottom of all the paper work and quickly wiped the tear that was streaming down my face. I watched the nurse take the paperwork from my hands then walking out of the hospital room. Then it was just my dad and I in the room. As I held his motionless hand more tears started to fill my eyes.

I felt like a trader. I felt like I had given up on my father. He derved so much more than what he got. Yet here I was signing his life away.

" I'm sorry, I just don't know what else to do" I cried into his hand.

I wished he would have been able to see me doing my first modeling photoshoot. I wished he was there for my first runway walk. I wished he was there to give me advice for the first time I cried over a boy, Harry in particular. I wished he could have been here for the day I walk down the aisle. I wished he could have met his future grand kids.

But that never happened and would never happen due to the situation.

So I did the only thing I knew what to do in that moment that could bring us closer, if possible. I sang him a song.

in the arms of the angel
fly away from here
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you fear
you are pulled from the wreckage
of your silent reverie
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort here

" that was beautiful" someone said from the door.

I turned my head, stilling holding my father's hand, to see Harry standing by the door. He was leaning against the door frame so perfectly that it was a small distraction to what was going around me. Harry was my distraction like I was his.