Overdose (BXB) Completed/Editing

Chapter 43 - Amnesia

Overdose - Chapter 43

-Nico-

I stare at the clock on the wall, watching the minutes go by but to me, they feel like hours. I slept for an hour before my brain decided that overthinking is a better use of time. I've watched the digits on the clock change since 3:00 AM. Though I felt tired, and my body craved sleep, my mind kept replaying Alex's last words before he fell asleep.

"I love you."

Last night was undoubtedly amazing and ending it off on that note made it feel more spectacular but...did he mean it? Or was it something he said in the heat of the moment? I peel my eyes away from the clock and stare down at him.

The ray of light coming from the window is casted over his bare skin making it look like it's glowing. His thick dark hair contrasts the whiteness of the pillow and sheets. He's remarkably beautiful and he's mine. I'm his. I don't think I could ask for anything more than that. I'm just afraid he said it because of what happened between us last night and not because he actually feels it.

Then again, I kind of sound like a narcissist thinking that sex with me prompted him to say I love you. Come on, Alex...wake up and tell me you love me again so I can stop overthinking.

I sigh heavily and run my hands through my hair. The storm last night took out the power for about an hour. It was warm in here but not uncomfortable. I bring my knee to my chest and rest my head on it as I stare out at the clear blue sky. Alex whimpers in his sleep before turning to face me. A smile creeps up to my face when I notice the unmistakable "bruise" on his neck. Heat finds its way to my cheeks when the sound of him moaning replays in my head. I didn't have a favorite sound before but now I do.

"I can feel you staring," He mumbles groggily. FINALLY!

"Morning, sleeping beauty," I chuckle and place a kiss on his cheek. They burn red and he turns over on his back, scooting himself up until his back is pressed to the headboard. "The power is back on," He rubs his eyes before looking around with squinted eyes. "Yeah, it came back an hour after you fell asleep," I explain, leaning back on the headboard too.

He nods and we fall silent, listening to the gentle humming of the fridge motor. "You didn't sleep, did you?" He asks, looking at my face knowingly. I'm sure I have bags under my eyes so there's no point in trying to hide it. I shake my head no and bite my lower lip. He frowns before pressing his lips together.

Does he not remember what he said before falling asleep? If so, he definitely said it in the heat of the moment. I felt my heart skip a beat when he said it and I couldn't stop smiling but the realization came slowly and cruelly. He's told me before that he doesn't feel that way yet and that it may not happen for a while. Though it hurt hearing that, I understand he needs time. If only I could have been temporarily deaf when he said it last night.

"Gonna shower," I mumble before walking to the bathroom. There's a strange tightness in my chest that makes it hard to breathe. Surely, he must remember everything that happened last night. Is saying 'I love you' the only thing he doesn't recall?

I take a deep breath before stripping out of my sweatpants and dropping them in the laundry basket. A shower may be the perfect remedy for the aching in my body right now. An ache stemming from a mix of the strenuous activity that took place last night and the disappointment of Alex's selective amnesia. I turn on the shower and watch the room become steamy before stepping in.

The water begins to pellet my skin relentlessly. It soaks my hair, sticking it to my forehead. I push it back and let the water run down my face. I don't think there's a point in bringing it up to Alex if he doesn't remember. When he actually feels it, he'll say it again. I won't ruin what happened by bringing it up and I think he'll appreciate that.