It Might Be You [Hotchniss]

XIV

trigger warning: cheating!

—

"What is this?"

The two take their hands off of each other and begin to pace around the room.

"I mean, what the hell did we just start?" Emily complains. "You're married! I kissed a married man for the second time!"

"You did," Hotch scratches his head, chuckling. "You're a good kisser."

Emily turns around and gives him a "what the hell" look. "Are you two different people? Please tell me you're coincidentally Hotch's twin and he just told you everything about me."

"It's me, Aaron Hotchner," he walks up to Emily, touching her cheek.

"You're an ass." She walks away from his touch, walking away from him. She didn't know what to do. "I'm serious, Hotch. What is this?"

"What do you want it to be?" Hotch asks.

She starts picking at her fingers. "Why me? Why'd you kiss me tonight? Why aren't you kissing your wife right now?"

"Because she's not you."

Emily's emotions were all over the place. As much as she was angry that she kissed a married man, she felt like it was the only thing that was going right in that moment. She stares at him, as he slowly walks towards her.

"The day I spent with Haley, I was hoping it was the first step to fixing our marriage. Then, an intimate thing happened. And it dawned on me that nothing's there anymore. No spark, at least," Hotch whispers. "But the little time we have together, the more I learn about you. You care about those around you, despite however they treated you in the past. You're willing to make people happy, even if in fact, you're not. But when it gets to a certain point, you break. I learned that you're just like me."

They both knew this was wrong but it felt so right. As he talked, Emily found his hands holding hers. She smiled at the feeling that she had someone, not just as a friend, but him.

Emily never wanted to let go, she felt safe with him. And Hotch felt the same.

"What is this, though? We're breaking so many rules here, Aaron," Emily looks at him. "You're still fucking married. And I can't do that to Haley. She's been nothing but nice to me. She wants kids with you. She believes you're the one for her."

"I'm planning on divorcing her. But she doesn't know yet," Hotch sighs.

She lets go of him, once again. He tries to explain himself. "You need to understand, it's been a while since our marriage has been slowly falling apart. I stayed for her happiness but I need mine. And it's not with her."

Emily knew what he was going to say next, she couldn't let him say it. From her first day of work to now, he thinks his happiness is with her? It couldn't be.

"If you're thinking of starting an affair, I'm not doing that. You need to end your marriage with Haley before anything goes forward between us," Emily states. "I'm serious about this."

Hotch smiles. "And I'm serious about you. I don't know if you are about me."

"I'm not getting your hopes up right now, Mister," Emily chuckles. "Go home and get this sorted out."

"Alright, alright. If it's for you, then it's going to be done."

And that was the last thing he said to her that night.