One Heart

6. Why didn't you just ask?

Kensie

Kensie forced herself from the bed, from the warmth of Sorah's body where she'd slept against her all night. She pulled on her running gear and reached for her sneakers, ready to belt her troubles into the pavement.

It was still dark when she slipped out the door, though later than when she would usually rise. She'd let herself get distracted, her usual morning routine upended these last few days.

She ran harder than usual, focusing on her breathing, controlling every movement, every breath, in her body. She'd never fought so hard to stay in control before, though she needed to be now more than ever.

The usual route took half the time, and as Kensie neared her street, the blackness of night faded, making way for the day.

Unlocking the door, she honed in on all activity within the house. Josh and Daniella still slept, while her father worked in his study. Relieved to find Sorah still asleep, she went in search of her mother, who was in the kitchen making breakfast.

"Morning, love," Maggie said.

Kensie gave a nod, taking a seat on a stool at the counter. "You're up early."

"Couldn't sleep." Maggie frowned. "I haven't seen Beth in years, had no idea whether she was still alive, but now I can't stop worrying. We were such good friends before everything happened. If Kahahn has her..." She shook her head, looking up at Kensie. "Want to talk about it?"

"About what?"

"Sorah."

Kensie shook her head. "Don't." She could ignore the problem as long as she didn't talk about it. Didn't dare admit that her gravitation toward Sorah was based on more than just her likeness to Isha.

"There's a strong possibility it's you, Kens. It would explain a lot," Maggie said, reaching into the fridge.

Kensie looked up at the ceiling, still shaking her head as if to rid herself of her mother's suggestion. "I know. It's all I can think about, whether it is or it isn't. But talking about it... that, I'm not ready for." She gripped the counter till her knuckles were white.

"Think of it this way, if it isn't you, you'll still remain by her side, no matter the pain it causes you. Who better to protect her than you? And if it is, you'll deal with it because you were born to. It will mean that you, and only you, can." Maggie's voice was stern in her attempt to convince Kensie. "And judging by the way that girl responds to you—the exact way Isha did with Daroah—that is a highly likely outcome, so you'd better start preparing yourself for it."

"No." Kensie shook her head again. She couldn't think about it. Couldn't fathom it. The best she could do was close her mind off, to dissociate, forget everything she knew, merely to tolerate having Sorah close. "It practically destroyed me when we lost Isha, and that was just friendship. I've managed to live my entire life without having to feel things that deeply. I haven't touched romance, let alone what this potentially is. I can't handle something that raw. I can't handle—no, I don't deserve the responsibility of that role." Maggie opened her mouth to argue but was interrupted by another barrage of thoughts. "And what's more, she's Isha's granddaughter! What would Isha say to me if she knew her best friend had intentions for her grandchild? Her very young, very innocent grandchild." She pursed her lips and looked up, willing herself to not let the tears fall and to calm her thoughts and shaking muscles.

"Sweetheart, Isha was a very wise queen," Maggie said. "There may even be a chance she saw this coming. Perhaps not exactly this, but I'm sure she knew you were important. If it is you, that girl is going to need you, and you don't need to be so afraid, you'll have her to help you through it."