Weak For Him | DARKNESS SERIES #1 ✔️

Chapter 115

Walking back out into the garden spliffs in hand with a lighter I hear Liam on the phone.
"I can't do this anymore, I need out of this fucking house I might as well go back to prison. What's the point" he says and I freeze. What the fuck? Am I that bad to be around. Did I do all this?
"I understand what your saying but I don't care, yes she's helping but she can't live this way, this is no life for her. She's perfect and should be out there taking the world by storm not locked up here with me" he spits annoyed at whatever the person said to him. He looks up seeing me and looks away.
"I need to go, yeah OK, bye" he says and puts the phone back into his pocket.
"Baby don't do this please, here smoke this" I tell him offering him a spliff.
"I don't need a fucking spliff, I need you to get what you deserve Stacey. This isn't going to be your fucking life, another week and I'm handing myself in" he tells me and I drop to my knees putting my head down.
"Nooo" I scream at the ground and my tears break through soaking my face. I can't hold them back any longer..
"Fuck. Stop crying, please stop crying! It has to happen Stacey you know this already. What was you expecting?" he asks and I can't stop the wrecking of my tears.
"I don't fucking know" I yell at him through my tears
"I don't deserve you baby, your to good for me. You need better. I'm just fucked and I'm fucking your life up with my shit. It would of been better if I just died that day" he says sadly. And I look up at him angrily standing and fly at him.
"Dont you ever fucking say that, you stupid, stupid bastard you hearing me. Never fucking say that again. Your being fucking selfish.. Its always what you want. What about fucking me and what I want Liam" I scream at him and he grabs my flying hands from him and pins them behind my back. I struggle against his hold and break down crying again.
"Please never say that" I tell him.
"I'm being selfish by keeping you here" he says and I shake my head violently.
"I'm choosing to be here Liam, your not fucking forcing me. I want this. I want you" I tell him emotional.
"Fuck, stop using my love for you against me, you know what I'm saying is right. You should be living your life.. Not stuck in this place with me" he says and I rip my hand from him and slap his face hard..
"That's it, want to hurt me. Go with that and turn it to hate, hate me instead it would be easier" he tells me and I step away from him.
"I can't do this" I tell him walking away back into the house, just because he doesn't want a spliff I fucking do.

Laying on the bed tear streaked face and two spliffs down, I stare up at the ceiling and think about what Liam said.
Is he being serious about handing himself in. I can't let him do that. Not again. I silently cry and curl up hugging myself when the door opens and I see Liam enter.
"Baby, don't be sad its the right thing to do and you know that" he says to me sitting on the bed next to me.
"I'm just a criminal baby, a fucking scumbag you can't and shouldn't love me" he says and I cry more into my pillow at his vile words.
"Well I do and I will never stop Liam, I  can't help how I feel, I love you so much" I tell him
"I fucking love you Stacey, and I want you more than anything, but you deserve better than a criminal I'm beneath you baby" he says and I sit up looking at him.
"Stop saying things that aren't true. Your putting words into my mouth when I don't think any of them things baby" I say and he grabs my hand looking at me.
"Please stop making this hard. All I want to do is hold you when I should be making you leave" he says and I shake my head at him.
"I'm not leaving you Liam, I can't and I don't want to. I want to be with you" I cry again and he wipes my tears.
"Stop please, your fucking with me when you need to leave and all I want is to make you stay" he says and I look at him
"I'm fucking with you? Your the most confusing guy I know. You love me and want me but want me to go. What the fuck Liam" I say annoyed and he sighs.
"I do love you and want you baby, and I don't want you to leave but I know you should" he says and I shake my head again..
"Stop talking about leaving. I'm not going Liam im being serious. I'm staying with you" I tell him sternly and sniffle wiping my eyes. I'm done fucking crying.
"Why do you have to be so stubborn and love me unconditionally, I don't deserve it" he says and I fold my arms..
"Exactly so I'm going nowhere get that through your fucking head. I. Love. You Liam. Johnson!"
"No, no, no! Your making my head and my heart be at war. I know what the right thing is to do but I love you too much to send you away" he says and a tear betrays me and slides down my cheek.
"Then listen to your heart like I did when I gave you another chance Liam, don't send me away again. I won't be able to handle it" I tell him and he looks emotional and his eyes are teary.
"I want to love you and be what you need baby but we both know that won't happen while I'm on the run" he says and I slowly nod agreeing with him.
"Why a week?" I ask him and he sighs.
"So I'm in fighting shape baby, I need to be able to defend myself, I won't lie to you, I know it's gonna go down when I get back inside I'm just hoping I come back out" he says and I shake my head.
"I won't let you hand yourself back in when your not hundred percent and end up getting yourself killed! It's not happening Liam" I tell him but he sighs.
"So you agree I should go back when I'm ready?" he says only listening to that part.
"I don't want you to leave me but if we want to be happy and normal you have to don't you?" I tell him and he nods sadly.
"Yes baby, I don't want to leave you either but what can I do? I want a life with you.. A proper one not this" he says waving his arms around. I understand what he means. But that doesn't mean I like it...
"OK" is all I say.
"OK.. Your letting me go for us to have a better life?" he says perking up but I can still see the sadness in his eyes.
"OK I'm letting you go back.. But when I think your good enough none of this week shit you understand" I pont at him being deadly serious.
"OK baby, I can work with that. Whenever you say" he says and I smile leaning into him as he cuddles me.
Our relationship is so fucked up but I love him unconditionally like he said so what is one to do? I'll never walk away from him!