Sinbound: Variants

Part 15

Author's note: Yay a new chapter!! This is getting crazy, but trust me, it will all work out in due time. I just, as always, must cause chaos before it's over (It's far from over, we are only on chapter 15) (: 

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"How did you kill your variant?" I say, nearly slamming the door against the wall I open it so hard. Loki follows me into the room, looking at me with one judgmental eyebrow raised and pursed lips as I stand tall in front of my mother.

She doesn't say anything, just sighs and smiles at me like she's proud I've finally caught up. "Do you see me now? I'm not but 50 years old and am already with the body of someone about to die. It's best you keep yours."

"Where, locked up forever? I know you did it. It all makes sense, now. How you ended up on Asgard as a Valkyrie years after you've been in this home. Val knew who you were, because why?"

"Buttercup, I know you're frustrated and scared. Sit, please." She says to me, gesturing towards the bed. I don't sit, instead I ball my fists and stand with my feet pressing hard into the ground.

"Tell me how you did it!" I insist.

"When you changed your future, you changed everyone's. What you missed when you were skipping around on your own timeline, was that you came here before you left for the war in New York. You told me you could give me my life back. You were so powerful, you insisted on giving it to me. What you failed to realize was that it would be your last act of humanity before your magic destroyed the rest of your conscience. You sacrificed yourself for me." She says, trying to stand up. She makes a sound of struggle, then sits back down, defeated.

"How do you remember that? The timeline is different now."

"The timeline is bupkis. I know what happened, and I know what happened again. You were going to split from your humanity one way or another." She says, starting to get upset. Our eyebrows furrow the same way. 

"Did Hela know this?"

"She counted on it! If she split your magic from you, I never would have come back and survived long enough to send your Valkyrie friend to find you and bring you to me. You would have died before you even got to that stone the second time around!"

"So that's what she was avoiding? Your return to Asgard?"

"She was avoiding your success, Ayca. Now that you've put it back together, your variant either stays locked up, or you drain your magic trying to get rid of her."

I can't believe this. The first separation was to stop the resurrection of the second one. My mother had a variant. Even if she refuses to tell me what happened, her advice that's clouded by her anger is still evident. If I kill the variant, I lose my magic. If that variant kills me, I lose my humanity. "So I'm fucked, is what you're saying."

"I'm saying you have help this time! I had no choice but to do it myself. I had a variant, I went against the nature of immortality. Do not make that same mistake, Ayca. Use your head, not your magic." She says, finally calming down.

I rest against the windowsill and look over at Loki who looks like he's trying to solve the equation of space itself. 

"What do you have to say about all this?" I ask him, my voice calm and soft.

His face changes from confused to it's normal arrogant, conceded expression and he says, "Well, first of all may I say that it would have been an honor to have known you as I grew up, Mrs. Beckland." He says, getting up and giving my mother a charming smile and holding his arm across his chest like a Prince.

"If I had stayed, I would have loved watching you grow into the Prince you are now, Loki. And please, call me Ramona. We're family."

"Of course, Ramona. May I also say that you are very brave to have taken on your own variant, and I understand the situation at hand currently. I will not disappoint you, Ramona."

"Wait, what?" I say, pushing off from the windowsill and standing in front of Loki. "You know how to fix this?"

"Yes, my dear. It's become very clear to me. Do you trust me?"

"We've been there before..." I say, chuckling.

"Buttercup," my mom starts, "You have a dangerous, thrilling road ahead of you with lots of side roads and construction and what not. But you must not panic when you have to take a detour onto an unknown road. You're headed home anyway, so you will get there no matter what conditions lie ahead."

"Thank you, mom. I love you." I say, giving her a hug. She's been through so much more than I've ever imagined, and if she thinks my story is only the beginning, she's right. I have a long road ahead of me.

We leave the home my mom is staying in and head back to the compound. On the way there, Loki and I have a talk in the car.

"You're very harsh on your mother sometimes."

"I got scared, she knows that." I answer quickly.

"I know you're scared, but this isn't impossible."

"What isn't? What do you know that you're not telling me?" I ask, looking at him. He's driving this time, one hand on the wheel while the other is propped up on the ledge of the door. His fist is folded over lightly and every once in a while he will rub the crease of his lips with the side of his index finger. He doesn't know this is attractive, but my god. I'm still annoyed with him, though. I wanna slap him across the face then kiss him.

"You're smart, my dear. You'll figure it out." He says, giving me a heartfelt look while at a stop light. He smiles at me, and it makes me really believe he knows I'll figure it out. I know I like to be told things right away, but he knows that deeper than that I like to figure things out, and I love to be right.

'Don't use my magic..." I say under my breath, looking out the window. I think for a little while until I doze off, falling asleep with my head against the window.

The next thing I'm awake for is Loki wrapping his arms around me and picking me up out of the car. He carries my half-conscious mind to a couch at the compound, laying me down gently. I'm too tired and mentally exhausted to wake up fully, but I hear a deep, cheerful voice come into the room. It's Thor, who's always overjoyed to see his brother.

"I know what to do. It's madness, but it will work."

"Tell me, brother." Thor says, and I hear footsteps fading away from the room.