Sinbound: Variants

Part 12

"Shit." I say, taking in a deep breath. What have I done? Where is everyone? Did I do this? When am I?

I start walking the streets to find anyone, any sign of life. I call to Heimdall to bring me to Asgard, but there's no answer. I try to steady my breathing, but it's uneven from the panic setting in. I trip occasionally over the rubble and debris from the destroyed city, and must have been walking around for almost two hours before I end up circling back again, this time right at the Stark tower.

"May as well." I say, entering in through the bottom floor. "Jarvis?" I call out. 

I hear a few mechanical beep noises and a rough voice that's slightly breaking up say, "Welcome back, Mrs. Laufeyson." I sigh a breath of relief. I never thought I'd be so happy to talk to a robot in my life. 

"Jarvis! What happened? Last thing I knew I was using the time stone because the variant was about to kill everyone..." I say, looking around for the molecular structure of the disembodied voice.

"I'm not sure you're ready to understand the undoing of the variant, Mrs. Laufeyson." He says hesitantly.

"What do you mean? Show me." I say, finally finding him slightly broken in the middle of dad's workshop. Jarvis sighs, then pulls up a slightly translucent screen of this morning. Hela is there, and so are the Avengers. We're fighting like how I remember, but then something happens. I start going astray, destroying anything and everything in my path. I gasp, tears filling my eyes. I had just crushed my dad under a building, Nat and Steve die, Thor has his hammer broken and is electrocuted by his own lightening. How is that even possible?

Hela was winning before I started doing the dirty work for her. I keep watching in horror, watching the Avengers fall one by one. I meet Hela on a rooftop, looking nothing like myself. I look terrifying, like a true devilish monster. I don't think twice about killing Loki, who came to save me. Then I easily destroy Hela, then proceed to wreak havoc on the entirety of New York City. I cry out, my voice cracking in pain. Jarvis stops the clip and I collapse on the floor. 

"There's no one left, is there?" I ask him through tears.

"You have me, darling." An illusion I make of Loki says. I just need to see him alive again. It could be doing more hurt than good, but I don't care.

"Loki, I'm so sorry. It's my destiny to just ruin everything." I cry into my hands. He kneels down in front of me, shushing me softly.

"I know, darling."

"How could you let me do this? Why didn't you lock me up? I would have done anything to prevent this!" I say, standing up suddenly. "I would have spent the rest of my life locked up in a cell alone than have this be the outcome every time. I... I killed you! I killed everyone because... because of this demonic curse? I can't..." I say, pressing my hands to my temples. "It can't be like this!" I let out a painful scream, and just look at Loki. He's looking at me with so much love and so much sadness at the same time. If only I could hold him, if only I could just escape and run away with him. Leave this demonic curse behind me and live a life of peace.

"How do I fix this?" I ask the illusion.

"I wish I knew, my love." He says, walking closer to me.

"If I may interject, Mrs. Laufeyson." Jarvis starts, "There is a loophole in the time sequence. You may be able to, with the correct timing, find it and retrieve the time stone."

"What? How? Tell me everything you know." I say, rushing towards Jarvis. I lean my hands on the counter, waiting for his response.

"Technically, the time stone was crushed in your timeline, but not the timeline you went back to. In theory, if Asgard is still in tact, the time stone remains untouched. It's a theory, but a long shot. It seems like your only option, Mrs. Laufeyson."

"How do I know if Asgard is still in tact? I already tried calling to Heimdall."

"That I cannot answer for you. I'm sorry I could not be of more assistance."

"It's ok, Jarvis. You've been more than helpful, thank you." I say, then turn to Loki. "You may be my illusion, but you're coming with me." I say, needing the comfort and company. I think for a moment, trying to figure out how to get back to Asgard without any help from anyone. I remember one time I picked up Thor's hammer. I doubt I'm worthy of it now, but it's worth a shot.

"If it's still even slightly in tact, I can wield it to get us to Asgard." I tell my illusionistic Loki.

"I think you can. You have only good intentions in your heart, Ayca."

"Sometimes good intentions still don't pave the road to paradise if it leads to something bad." I say doubtfully, fighting back tears. God, I hope this works.

I run out of the tower, Loki trailing behind me. "There!" He shouts, pointing to a pile of rubble under the hammer. I run over to it. The handle is cracked and the front is smashed in, but overall it still looks like a hammer. "Ayca, it could go weary and take you somewhere else." He warns.

"I know, but it's the only shot we have." I take a deep breath, stretching my fingers wide to prepare to lift the hammer. My stomach turns, and I already feel like the plan failed. I grip the handle after looping the leather strap around my wrist. I take in a deep breath and shut my eyes tight, feeling sick. If this doesn't work, I have nothing left.

I lift the hammer. 

I exhale loudly with a short laugh, not believing what just happened. I look over at my illusional husband, who looks as proud as ever.

"What are you waiting for, darling?" He asks, dissipating into the air. I rotate the hammer in the air, starting off slow. This bitch is heavy, but nothing I can't handle. It's picking up speed, and as it starts to make a whooshing sound I toss it into the air, holding onto the end. As I ascend into the air, I look down at the damage I had done to this city... to my home. I'm going to fix this.

I arrive on what's left of Asgard. Part of the rainbow bridge is submerged in water, and I have to fly over the gap. I leave the hammer at the end of it, right before the city starts. No one's going to be able to pick it up, it'll be fine.

I make my way through the golden ruins of this lost city. It kind of reminds me of Atlantis a little bit. I try to find my way, but it's confusing now that half the palace is missing. I pass by the throne room and look inside. I yelp in pain suddenly, seeing it empty. My throat knots and my stomach cramps. I really am alone, aren't I?

I hurry along, then trip and hit the ground hard. "Ow, fuck!" I yell, hearing my voice travel down the hallway. As I get up I hear a faint voice of a woman. 

"Who's there?" It calls out in a lower register than mine.

"Nobody, fuck off!" I say getting up, hoping to god it's not Hela. To my surprise, a battered young woman emerges from around the corner on the other end of the hallway. Her hair is frizzy and dirty, and the white marks on her face have smudged. "No way..." I say under my breath as I run towards her. "Valkyrie!" I say, knocking hard into her with a hug.

She pushes me off, almost insulted. "No, we're not friends!"

"Ok, look. I know it looks like I did some pretty ugly things, but please listen to me." I try to plea.

"Yeah right! You go back to New York and sit with the fact that you went completely she-devil on everyone. That's your burden."

"That's not when I'm from! Look, it's a long story, but please. You have to help me."

She looks me up and down, judging me. Her lip snarls and she rolls her eyes. "You said that's not 'when' you're from? Don't tell me you-"

"Yeah, I took the time stone. It fucked everything up, and now I need to change everything back so I die for a little bit and discover a variant of myself that survived, but actually take care of it this time."

"What?" I've confused the shit out of her. 

"Not important at the moment. Look, are you going to help me, or not?" I look at her intently, hoping to god she says yes.

"You owe me." She says, pointing a finger in my face.

"Then follow me." I say, leading her to the weapons vault.