MIGHT BE REOPENING???// NO STRAIGHT ROADS (NSR) ONESHOTS \\

⚠️Neon J || Lost Cause ⚠️

I'm in some feels bc I'm questioning a lot so here. Sorry if this is too similar to Save Me.

TW: Panic attack, PTSD, war, gore, mental illness
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It was so loud.

The screams.

The gun shots.

The bombs.

The air raid planes.

The smell strong enough to choke the dead. Metallic, rotting flesh, the sopping wet earth below his feet.

It all felt so real.

He stood amongst his memories, staring at his fallen friends and troops once again.

The memories replayed over and over as if it were a broken record.

Another loud bang, then a stinging pain.

The warmth of a liquid seeping out dripped down his chest.

He didn't bother looking down, this wasn't how it happened anyway.

Or was it? He couldn't remember.

So many false memories flooded his database that he didn't know what was real and what wasn't.

He let his body relax as he fell to the ground.

His vision went dark. . . Then everything came back into view.

Only it was reality, his room, the pictures on the walls, the light next to him, the cord stuck out of his nape.

His mechanical body felt stiff as he stood. He was fully charged so why did everything feel dull and numb?

He yanked the cord out and let it drop and ravel back into its spot.

Traipsing to the mirror, he stretched a bit.

That radar screen stared back in the reflective glass. He was getting sick of seeing that stupid thing.

Huffing, he turned his back on his reflection and grabbed his jacket on his way out of his room.

The boys were already in position, awaiting their new orders for the day.

Each of them knew their Captain wasn't feeling all that swift, and they glanced at each other as if telepathically talking.

Once standing in front of them, J tried squaring his shoulders to seem better, but it all was a failed attempt.

Rin was the first to speak, "Sir, are you alright?" He was hesitant, his silvery eyes holding more emotion than even a humans.

J held his head high, "Of course! Why wouldn't I be?" He already knew the answer to that.

"Because you look like sh-" Zimelu was cut off by Purl-Hew slapping a hand over his brother's mouth.

"Sir, we know about. . . everything." Eloni fidgeted with his collar as he spoke.

"And it's getting worse as it goes on, sir." Haym added.

"I'm fine, boys. Truly. I appreciate your concern, but I'm alright. All I have for you boys today is practice for tonight's show." J forced a smile into his voice, knowing it's not working. He didn't want to put to much onto his boys. Besides, it's his problem, he should be strong enough to handle it on his own.

"If you say so, sir. If you need anything, let us know, okay?" Rin gave him a reassuring smile before going off to the practice room, the others trailing behind him.

J waited until he heard the music start up before dropping the act.

He left a message on the door before going out.