Fallen

The Art of Words

Words. They are simple but just so POWERFUL. They have the power to capture, to set free, to give happiness, to torture, they're so loud yet so quiet. Words. I and words have had a rather complicated relationship. I hate them but they're the only thing that has kept me going all these years. It's funny how they give so much HOPE yet so much DISAPPOINTMENT.

 Ever since I was a kid, I was a misfit. I was FAT. There I said it. The word fat was the only word that defined me. It was the only word that people noticed and it was the only word that they used to judge me. What was inside all those layers of fat didn't matter. To make matters worse, I was sensitive. You see, sensitive is a funny word. It means good. Being sensitive is something most people can't experience. It means you can look right into someone's soul, study them with depth, make their problems your own. But people misuse this word sensitive. It also means you get hurt too easily, you get attached too easily. And that is what happened to me

When I was a child, I used to go to this rich kids school. All that ever happened in that school was showing off. And I wasn't as rich as those kids. My parents didn't come to drop me off in a Mercedes or BMW. And yeah I was also fat. So I was the bully's favorite target. Every once in a while a bully would come to me and make fun of me pinch me in the stomach, poke me with a pencil, hoping I would deflate like a balloon. Every once in a while, they would come to tease me about my parents' black WagonR. 

So I made a world of my own. Made purely out of words. To escape that reality. The real world wasn't my cup of tea. In my world, everything was fine. I was thin and rich like a barbie doll and no one would tease me. In the real world, I was very good at studies because I loved books. I always thought of books as an ocean that I could just dive into. The words were my oxygen. Books were a second world to me. You see, I had to deal with 3 worlds. 3 whole worlds. 

But things never stay the same forever. Good times don't last forever and neither do bad times. And when you've transitioned to good times from bad times after a very long time, you REALLY LEARN TO APPRECIATE IT.