Impossible (Mha fic)

Learning control, kinda

I was hoping that the appearance of my quirk would rid me of the headache I suffer from almost every day. Sadly with the appearance of my quirk the headaches are more frequent and intense as I try to deal with the constant onslaught of voices in my head. It's hard to discern my own thoughts from those of the bodyguard standing guard outside or the woman doing her daily jog. It's bad enough that I can hear these thoughts but on top of that I can feel the emotions behind them. It's enough to confuse me when I'm doing something that does not require me to actually think. I suddenly have to remind myself to pour the milk in my bowl of cereal, can you believe that?

While my parents try to find something to help with my on all the time quirk I try to learn some semblance of control. I figure meditation was the right way to go and quickly learned that by clearing my mind I'm just making more space for everyone else's thoughts. I spent that night wondering why my bodyguard is constantly thinking of the colour blue. What's so special about blue? A couple of night later I went back to meditation, this time with a plan. I let the thoughts enter my mind and this time I tried to push them out one by one. I thought it was a good idea, it sounded like a good idea and it seemed logical. If I can remove stray thoughts I can block them out completely at some point. That makes sense, right?

Yup, that makes sense.

Did I succeed? Not really. Forcing thoughts out of my head felt as if I was trying to push a literal wall, in other words, it was exhausting and brought with it a headache. I didn't expect to succeed on the first try so I continue this for a month. I did it at night mostly since my days are spent studying, playing some sports with my dead and visiting many support company in an effort to find something for me. A close friend of my mother offered to make something herself so one out of four weeks had me in a lab being tested. I did not understand half the things she said about my brain waves but I think she figured something out. It's safe to say the woman made progress, as did I. I'm not sure on what attempt I succeeded but I managed to force a single thought out of my head with amazing success. My head hurt like hell after that, but it was an achievement.

I had gone to my mother's friend with this news I told her everything about my attempts. Lucky me she said it could work although she is not sure if I'll be able to unconsciously block out stray thoughts. Even when if I manage to do it manually she was concerned about the exhaustion and headache the attempt brought.

She encouraged me though, so I continued. That woman is really nice.

One month later and here I am, running laps around my backyard with my father watching the show. This man has the audacity to just sit there,chios in hand and thoughts all but polite. He was mocking me, knowing I am very much aware of his thoughts. And he's so loud too, somehow having the ability to scream in his head.

"Would you shut up!"

"What do you mean?" He's grinning like an idiot, another insulting thought invading my mind. "I haven't said a word, Zen"

"You know what you're doing!" I shouldn't be yelling while running. I'm tiring myself out for no reason. He's just aggravating and he knows it. He's doing it all on purpose.

I just have to ignore him. If I focus on my own thoughts I might drown out his annoying words to some degree.

𝑨 𝑩 𝑪 𝑫 𝑬 𝑭 𝑮 𝑯 𝑰 𝑱 𝑲 𝑳 𝑴 𝑵 𝑶 𝑷

Why is he singing the alphabet?! This childish bastard!

"I'm telling mom!"

~~~~~~~~

Rose is used to returning to the most confusing scenes and is not at all surprised to find her husband lying on the floor receiving a beating from their angry five-year-old. Zena is kicking him in the gut, yelling accusatory words at him. She has no idea what he had done but she's sure he deserves everything their daughter is doing to him. She couldn't help but smile as he yelled in pain, obviously faking his sufferings to appease his daughter. While they have their moment in the living room she makes sure to put all the groceries away before getting to work on dinner. She had spent the entire day at the lab helping her friend construct a device that would do the work of blocking thoughts for her daughter.