My Dear Melancholy (Daveed Diggs x reader)

The Sneeze

DAVEED'S POV

school started in a week, all the teachers had to get a covid test soon to make sure everyone was good to go. y/n got the green light to go on and it helps that her class is so small, there wouldn't be a huge risk of spreading anything.

we both agreed that if one of us got sick we'd go to her mom's house, it's close and the best idea.

y/n was working on her garden outside, she'd been out here a lot. clyde has been around me a lot, almost trying to get me to go somewhere; it's been happening for a while.

i tend to wake up before her, i take the time to see her still face. the way her features look so at ease when she's sleeping, i'm completely aware it's creepy.

before i clyde ran into the office to bark at me i was typing away some final touches on my class work for this year, but clyde always got my attention.

"what do you want bud?" i turned around to see him wagging his tail, he couldn't stand still. "what do you need?" i stood up and clyde backed up a bit, he then ran out of the room.

i walked out to see him by the door, i couldn't see the shadow of y/n outside. i opened the door and clyde just stepped outside.

and there she was, summer attire, a book in one hand, and the hose drowning the plants in the other.

"babe." i cheered my throat.

"yes- oh shit!" she pulled away the hose, and the plants were all drenched but the vegetables and herbs under them planted in the ground seemed pretty good. "oh god..." she mumbled as she tried to pat down the soil.

"i don't think that helps," i laughed and took the book and out it on the little seat on our front porch, "let's-" i was cut off by the sound of a loud buzz, i turned around to see our annoying neighbour cutting wood. i don't even think a seventy year old should be around power tools.

y/n just giggled an headed inside with me, clyde came in as well, soccer was sitting in the couch.

"i see you're reading a lot." i asked as i got some water for the bath of us.

"y'know, maybe the splurge wasn't that bad." she folded the corner of the page and closed the book. "that skateboard in the other hand..." she glanced off to see it collecting dust by the front door.

the constant humming of the power tools and the wood being cut made the absence of it seem weird, i was almost waiting for it come back.

"let me think i'm kid again," i tried to be serious.

"we should- oh...AH-CHOO! jesus..." she sniffled after pulling her elbow away from her nose, "pollen."

"really?" i tried to covered my nervous tone but it was a dead giveaway.

"daveed, i'm not sick, don't worry." she stood up and sniffled, "that was around since i got outside. pollen." she pointed out the window.

a little later in the afternoon i wanted to get her outside at least, i know if she was sick it would've already been passed to me but it was peace of mind.

we were going to learn how to skateboard together, y/n seemed to have the right idea. she held onto my forearms when i'd go, it was somewhat hard to hear her with the blaring noise of wood being cut but we got used to it.

there was some wind today, near the end of our fun she was sneezing again. of course it was the pollen's fault but my anxiety was only going up, and she knew it.

we both spent the rest of the day writing and typing, i wanted to get my classwork done to leave time before going back to school to get one last bit of relaxation. we both agreed to finish our work sooner rather then later.

on my run i couldn't help beaut be hyper aware of everyone around me, i could easily be asymptomatic and the reason y/n is sneezing.

there was lots of people using the outdoor patios, we haven't been but i really like them. i know some of the owners of these restaurants and shops and i know this is killing their business.

throughout the day she kept sneezing, there was no other symptoms but, she was sneezing. i tried to be as careful as possible, trying to stay a distance but i knew it wouldn't work.

we were making dinner together, having stir fry, every time she'd sneeze she go and wash her hands right away, which was good.

she plated it all up and we ate at the island, i was extremely stiff. i tried to talk myself down but it was so hard, like lettuce in someone's teeth; always hard to tell a person for some reason.

"i know you think i'm sick." she stated as she stabbed some chicken.

"whaaaaaat? no way!" i need acting lesions...

"daveed. i'm fine. it's pollen, my garden is finally working and it's creating pollen." she took a bite.

"i'd believe you if it was spring, but it's the end of summer." i tried to be a delicate as possible, "sunshine, it's not pollen."

"but i'm not sick, i feel fine." she took my hand and put the back on her forehead, "not burning up. no dry throat. i can taste the stir fry." she was making a good case, "plus, school starts this monday, we get tested on the sunday."

"that's still a couple days, y/n." i tried to hide behind the food, taking bigger bites to avoid conflict.

"so what do you want me to do?" she leaned back. "you want me to stay at my mother's house? to get tested? what?" she was defeated, there was no way she was going to win against my anxiety.

my heart had been racing all day, seeing her sneezing. we both knew this wasn't good, not only for school but for her life. all day i had been trying to down play my feelings, trying to push them aside.

this is the love of my life, and she could be sick. just like her mother who's now in a senior home with people way older then her, or sick like her dad, really sick.

i've never been faced with death and grief but i saw it on y/n what seemed like years ago, i only grieved a gold fish. i think i'm so nervous because i could never imagine not looking at her when i wake up before her every morning. all the laughs, i couldn't fathom not hearing her voice, i'd have to deal with the dog if my deceased girlfriend, just adding salt to the very opened wound.

you're thinking too much, she's not dead. she's right there. look at her, she's so beautiful.

"i-..." i looked her deep in the eyes and saw the summer memories, "i want you to stay alive."

she sighed, her face slightly falling. it was so clear she'd been trying to push it out of her mind as well. she gave a sad smile and opened her arms, reluctantly i fell into a hug and held on tighter then i normally would.

if she was actually sick and i was asymptomatic this wouldn't hurt either of us, i had been scared all summer because this stupid virus took her father quickly, it almost took her mother. i knew she was a fighter but this thing knew how to knock someone out first round.

"i'm going to say alive, i promise-"

"don't say that-" i shook my head.

"daveed. i'm not dead, and i won't be for a while." she gently pushed back a couple pieces of hair, "y'know, we haven't been on our first date yet. i'm pretty sure you promised to blow your pay check on me, some fancy italian restaurant, i'm holding on for that." she cracked a smile and i couldn't help but smile as well. "i can die happy after rich italian food." she kissed my forehead and let me hug her again.

"i don't think you're sick, but part of me does." i admitted.

"me too," she whispered, "so what would you like me to do to ease your stress?"

"just...just stay with me, it's getting colder outside with the weather changing." i tightened my grip and held onto her for dear life.