The new teacher, Ms Blanchett.. (femXfem)

# Chapter 14 #

Tw:self harm

I eventually had to leave Cate's house, which sucked since I'd never felt so safe as I did with her. She had already helped me, so much, and then she tried to help me with my eating problems. I couldn't lose her, I wouldn't make a single day without at least a text from her.

***

"Hey Hanna, how was it at Jessica's?" My father asked as I came back later that day. "Oh, yeah it was fun, but I'm quite tired" I replied and gave him a small and fake smile. "Not much sleep I assume" he joked, a light chuckle left my mouth and I was soon back in my room.

The buzz of my phone caught my attention, and I rolled my eyes seeing who was calling.

"What do you want Elle?" I said in an annoyed tone.

"Well, I want you. Come to my place" She said in her husky voice.

"No, why would I ever do that, I do not want to see you, neither do I wanna talk, bye" I was an centimeter from hanging up when she shouted.
"I'll tell the principal!" I scoffed.
"Tell her what?"

"About you and Ms Blanchett"

"Like she would believe you, how often does she talk to you about your bad behaviour Elle?" I said in a mocking voice.

"Fuck you Hanna, just think about all the things I've done for you, and see if you still hate me" She talked fast and I heard her slightly panting.
"You haven't done anything more than hurt me, don't call me again, bye Elle"

I miss Cate..

Suddenly I felt quite pathetic, I had just spent the night and morning with her, but I missed her like crazy right after. I'm hopeless without her, I'm hopeless, she can't change that, I'll be that as long as I live.

Then a rush of guilt washed over me, I felt bad for her. She helped me so much, she will have to take care of me when I have sleepless nights because of horrible thoughts. She'll have to help me get out of bed those days I felt like shit and can't bear to even walk. And all the cuts, all the blood and all the pain I constantly felt. She would have to just deal with it, just to be with me. You're a terrible girlfriend Hanna, poor Cate, having to take care of you like that.

"Why can't I be normal, why do I have to be like this.." I whispered to myself. My body was itching, craving the razor blade hidden in my room. You ate breakfast, even though you knew this would happen, how stupid of you. Do it now, you deserve it.

With shaky hands I grabbed the blade, remembering which side of it was the sharpest, I placed it on my forearm. I dragged it across my arm, slower than usual, and also deeper than usual. The comforting feeling of blood trailing down my arm made me smile. But that smile quickly disappeared when I heard a knock.

"Can I come in?" My dad asked.
"Wait a minute!" I shouted, taking my dark purple blanket and covering my arm and part of my body to not look suspicious. "Come in"

"Hey honey, can you make dinner and make sure Ella goes to bed and that later tonight?" He wore an amused smile I heard mom fixing her hair in the bathroom. "Sure, are you going out?" I asked, trying my best not to be weird or you know, act like I just cut myself. "Yes, there's a gathering, well, party, if you will, a few neighbourhoods away and we were invited" he said.

"Okay, good for you, you haven't been out in a while, I understand" I smiled as he walked out and mouthed thank you. But then I got an idea. "Wait, dad?" He turned back around.
"You and mom should book a hotel room and stay a night, get some privacy and relax, me and Ella can take care of ourselves, and besides, it's break from school, so?"

"Are you sure there's no problem with that? It's okay to be alone for you two?" He asked a bit worried, but I saw how happy he was. "Yeah, it'll be nice for us too"
"Okay then, we'll do it, love you"

***

Mom and dad were gone, and now I could do the best of the situation.
"Hey Ella?" I shouted, her door flew open. "What?!"
"Do you wanna be alone for a while? Mom and dad won't be home until Sunday afternoon"

She looked at me confused. "And where are you going then? I'm sure it isn't to Jess, do you have a girlfriend?"
She chuckled and walked down the stairs. "Oh right, who would date you? Except that crazy girl" She mocked.
"Shut up" I pushed her shoulder.
"So you have a girl?" She said with a smirk.

"Is it okay if I leave? Answer my question" I said annoyed.
"Not before you answer mine" that bitch of a sister, always playing the devil's advocate. "Yes, okay, happy now?" I finally gave in, her smirk grew wider.

"So you're going to her place to fuck her?" I just rolled my eyes as a response. "You are, fine, go I'll be alright" She said, heading back up to her room. "Thanks Ella, love you"
"Spare it!" She shouted, making me laugh.

***

Me: hey, can I come over tonight? And stay? My parents aren't home, but my sister is, so you can't come here 💜🙏🏻

Cate 💕: oh, of course, you want me to pick you up?

Me: You don't have to

Cate 💕: But I want to

Me: Fine, are you here in 30 min?

Cate 💕: Yes, love you

Me: Love you too

I got ready, I put on a pair of black, loose pants and a dark blue sweater.
I packed some extra clothes in case something happened, and also put on some make up, brushed my hair and put it in a ponytail. A honk from a car could be heard and I grabbed my stuff, said bye to Ella, and got out.

________________

Sorry for not updating in a while, this whole thing with Helen made me lose my shit. But I'm back and trying to write, and I'm seriously thinking about starting an ocean's 8 fanfic, it won't be posted in a while of course, I also have 2 other books on writing, so there's a lot. Anyway hope you liked this chapter <3

And btw guess who's a week free from sh ✋🏻