Shatter (arlo x OC) UnOrdinary fanfic

Anxiety

Leah's POV:

He was pissed.
It wasn't obvious but his hardened gaze and slightly clenched jaw showed he wasn't pleased.

In an effort to keep myself grounded and avoid completely freezing out, I dug my nails into my palms;
focusing on the sharp pain instead of my paralyzing fear.

fuck
how the hell did he even know i was here

I flinched at the sudden movement as his hands left the door and found their way into his pockets.

My gaze also flickered away from his eyes, desperately looking for something else to focus on.

There was a momentary pause.

"When i allowed you access to this roof, i wasn't exactly giving you permission to lock me out."

There was another pause.

ah.
he's waiting for me to say something.

"... I was-" it came out shaky.

"I was just about to open it" the last two words were breathy and quiet. If he had been any farther, he wouldn't have been able to hear it.

I forced my tightened throat to swallow to avoid letting out my quickened breaths.

Even without looking at him, i could feel his gaze on me.

It was suffocating.

His stare lingered for an extra second.

"I see."

He stepped into the roof and i quickly stepped further back to clear the way.

As he moved closer to the fence and further away from me, the vice-like grip of fear slowly loosened its hold. Just barely to the point where my breathing was evening out.

With a small sigh, he sat down. His back rested on the fence and his eyes returned to mine.

"sit down"
He slightly nodded towards the floor next to him.

It didn't seem like he was angry anymore but that confused me even further.
But realizing that i was keeping him waiting again, i quickly shuffled over and took a seat.

Gluing my eyes to the floor in front of us, i clenched my clammy fists and breathed out the phrase that's been swimming around my mind.

"I'm sorry."

Once again, it was quiet and shaky. Barely above a whisper.

Arlo on the other hand, leaned further back into the fence, completely relaxing.

Remembering that he liked eye contact, without thinking, i shifted my head to meet his gaze. It was an act of impulsive bravery because i knew if i had pondered on this any longer, i would have been frozen in place again.

His face was back to the composed calmness i've grown used to.

For some reason, this calmed me. The thudding heartbeat i've been hearing began to dull down.

My voice barely reflected this newfound bravery though.

"I'm really sorry about..." it was a bit louder than my previous statement but still as shaky.

"everything Arlo."

I was an utter idiot for thinking I had calmed down.

Starting this apology caused the anxiety to come slamming back.

"I-i'm sorry for locking the door and not opening it,
a-and the outburst back in the library,
and being with the group of bullies during lunch, and-"