//caesura//

//17: home//*

A/N: this one was short sorry :/

The moment I hit the ground I
feel the air shoot from my lungs and the excruciating pain in my upper hip.

Looking up I see the window in which I fell from, the light is out now and my vision is going hazy. I try pulling myself up the first time afraid that he's going to come running outside to drag me back.

The moment I'm up I fall back down, my hip popping. I know I shouldn't have jumped but it seemed smart at the time and now I can't get up. I hear his footsteps on the driveway and that sends me into a panic, I shift my body up and pull myself against the house fighting the pain I feel in my legs and my head. I hop across the end of the yard that separates our house for the neighbors.

I hear him behind me, but I don't stop. I keep hoping, struggling to land on the porch, hurting my hip even more. That's when I start screaming, when I know he's right behind me, grabbing my legs and pulling me back.

I scream for help watching the lights in the house light up. I feel his body on top of mine and suddenly he covers my mouth dragging my body away but the door opens. He pulls us back on the side of the house and pushes his hand harder against my mouth. I thrash around, kicking away with my good leg but his grip is tight and once the sound of the door shutting sounds out he let's go, pushing my body under his.

"Your being really stupid, Joclin." I struggle, pulling my leg free and reaching it up, kicking him in the crotch. He falls down on top of me and breaths into my ear. "Cut it out right now!"

"Get off!" I try my best to push my hand up and him away but I'm stuck. My legs are the only things free and all I can do is flail around like a fish out of water. He pulls at my hair, raising it up and smashing it against the ground.

-

The walls are white, blinding like the head lights of a car. I'm not all too sure where I am but I'm not home, I'm not at Adam's and I'm damn sure not with Matty.

It's so hard to focus on anything because all I can feel is the pain coursing through my lower body, like I've been hit by a truck. My head feels like it weights the world so I try my best not to move, even when all I want to do is get up.

The second thing I notice is that I'm wearing new clothes. My blue jeans and white-t have been exchanged for white shorts and a plaid-t.

That's when I see them.

The long thick dis-colored bruises along my legs, and the cuts circling my ankles and knee caps.

I hear a door open to my left and I try to turn my head to see.

A man steps in front of me and my limbs go stiff.

What?

Matty?

"Hey, joc-" his voice is rough and brittle.

"Matty?" My vision goes hazy for a second and I'm sure that he'll disappear but when I regain sight he's still standing there, in his jumper and skinnies.

"Help me, Matty."

"It's ok," he tells me and then bam. Gone.

I feel like I'm going crazy! I'm seeing things and I can't even see clearly. When I blink again Adam is standing in front of me with a roll of bandages. I flinch and turn my head, sucking on my teeth.

"Sit up, I need to change those bandages."

"What?" He steps forward grabbing my head. I freak out, pushing him away.

"Calm down, you have a concussion, now you wouldn't want that to get worse." A concussion?

"From what?"

"I don't know- probably jumping from a window?"

"Oh-"

"Yeh oh, now. Let me change your bandages." He lifts my head up and I can feel the pressure being released from my head applied again. When he's done he drops them down into a silver tin, crusted blood covering every layer of them.

I gasp at all the blood, turning my head away.

"You were losing a lot of blood, I was afraid you'd die. That's why I brought you here."

"A hospital?" He nods. "Well where are the nurses?"

"You need a few more for your legs, I'll be back." He ignores me.

"No, stop!" I shout, rising out of bed a little. He stops dead in his tracks and turns hesitantly.

"What?" Actually I don't know what to say, I have nothing to say, I don't want to see him.

"Nothing." I breath, sitting back down. He leaves shutting the door and locking it behind him. I cup the blanket in my hands and push my legs up to my aching chest.

Day turns to night and soon it's hard to keep time besides when Adam comes in to clean my wounds and then leaves.

Although I'm sure it's been a week or two maybe three or a month. I don't know.

My head has healed significantly, there's less and less blood every day, and my legs are okay now, they have scarred over and the bruises are a soft black rather than a harsh green.

Today Adam leaves the door open and shoves a plate of food in my lap. There's some sort of meat on the plate that I refuse to touch.

"I think you're ready to go home now. You're head looks fine and your legs are better." He touches the back of my head and examines my leg, taking a moment to smile at me.

"What do you think?" I nod, chewing at the Weiss granola bar on the plate.

"I think that sounds great." He smiles at me and leans down, kissing my forehead.

"I'll get everything in the car and you can meet me out there in a few, okay?" I give him a nod and a smile.

"Okay." He grabs the plate from my lap and leaves, the door still flapping wide open.

I stand, my leg wobbling as I grab the jacket he placed in here earlier today and pull on the dark washed jeans. There's a pair of toms half-way shoved under the bed, so I grab those and put them on. My hair is matted down from the dried blood and scabs so I throw the hood over my head and start to leave.

I smell it before I see it, the white soft layer of snow covering the field. Through the window it looks like a framed picture. Some place I don't deserve to be but am hopelessly trapped.

I figured that this wasn't a hospital, but, a house? I would have never guessed. Pictures of a family I've never met litters a table in the hallway, some man with black hair and white eyes and a woman just the same. Below them sits three children, two girls and a boy in the middle.

Adam?

I raise the picture closer to my face, seeing the man more clearly.

Oh no.

Is that...Matty's dad?

"Joclin-" hearing the sound of his voice I shudder, dropping the picture at my feet. "I'm so sorry." I say, trying to gather the shards.

"Stop, you're gonna hurt yourself." He walks over, pulling the glass from my hand, but I've already cut my palm.

"Oh shit, stay right here, I'll go get a rag or something." I nod and clench my teeth. I look back down at the picture, now out of its case and ripped in some areas. There's a fold on the side and I take that and pry it open. Another boy stands aside from the family, a little raven haired boy with a little less tattoos but still caramel eyes and a wonderful smile.

He comes back with a wet towel and wraps it around my hand.

"Who are they?" I ask, clenching the towel in my hand, moving the picture for him to look at.

"That's my family." He grimaces.

"That's not your mom."

"No, that's my biological mother." I point to the man.

"And him?" I look up to his hateful face as he tears the picture from my hand and throws it across the room-frame and all.

"Let's go!" He growls grabbing my wrist.