Confessions

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Vincent:

The theme song to Sanford and Son played on my television screen, which meant it was three o'clock in the morning. Often I spent my nights staring up at the ceiling while reruns of old shows echoed in my room. Sleep did not come easily for me. My mind was plagued with the dark memories of my past; memories from my fucked up childhood, and memories from my time spent with Emily.

I wondered where I would be now if I had never met her. Would I have been able to overcome my deep seeded insecurities, or would I have fallen prey to another beautiful woman? I supposed it wasn't fair of me to assume everything was Emily's fault, but if she would have returned my love, none of those terrible things would have happened to us.

The overthinking was the main reason I hated it being held prisoner in the hospital.  As bad as the Greers treated me, it was far worse to have all this time to ponder my life choices.  It was unhealthy.

I chuckled half heartedly when I shifted my focus on the television, then I remembered how much my father loved the show playing. The thought of him was enough to make me burst into tears. I shut off the television and threw my hands over my eyes.

That bastard still had power over me, despite the fact that he died almost ten years ago.  I wanted so badly to heal from all the pain he caused me, but it would never happen while I was in this place. 

It was time for me to get out of here.

The door to my room opened. I laid my head on my pillow and pretended to be asleep.  I wasn't in the mood to be checked on for what felt like the hundredth time in the last few hours.

That stupid shit irritated me to no end. If it wasn't one of the orderlies making sure I was still here, it was a nurse checking my vitals. Even when I was able to sleep, those assholes always woke me up.

The light switch was flipped on.

Cold fingers wrapped around my wrist.  My eyes popped open from the sudden touch.  Stella stepped back when she saw the rage on my face. 

"I'm sorry to wake you, Vincent." She whispered, her hands trembling as she lowered them to her sides.  Why was she so damn scared? I've never given her a reason to think I would hurt her.

There was still no doubt in my mind that something had happened between her and the Greers, and as much as I hated the idea of those two psychopaths running off another pretty nurse, I could use Stella's vulnerability to my advantage. 

She was obviously a troubled young lady. 

I could see it in her eyes.

She needed a friend, a shoulder to lean on. 

And I was going to be that friend.

"I'm the one who should apologize.  I tend to be a bit rude when I first wake up." I extended my wrist to her, allowing her to check my pulse.

"I don't blame you," She grinned and took my wrist into her fingers.  "I suppose I would be annoyed too if some jackass woke me up every hour."

"Well, it's a pleasure to have you visit me, even at three in the morning.  You're much better to look at than any of the other nurses, especially Beverly."

Her cheeks flushed.  "That's very sweet of you."

"It's true.  You're a beautiful young lady, Stella."

There was still a smile on her lips, but I could see the sadness behind her eyes.  She reminded me a lot of myself, trying to mask something painful with false smiles and awkward humor. 

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