Surrounded by Bad Boys

"I think I'm on my Period"

        Look who updated again!! *Sings*I just did 3 in a row! My updates back to back to back now! ..I didnt really do 3 but 2 yay me!! Enjoy this chapter lovlies!

Drunk Jamie In Photo.

        I took another gulp from my friend Jack Daniels and winced a little at my fast intake. It was late Friday night and no one was home. Mom had left a message that she had plans and Eric texted me that he was hanging out with his “boys”. I stood in front of my mirror and tilted my head to the side examining myself. “You. Are. Weak.” I say to myself. I pick up my bottle and place it on my lips. When I throw my head back I’m saddened that the bottle is empty. I drop my arm and turn to leave my room.

                I wobble down the stairs holding on to the wall for support. Once I finally make it down the stairs I walk into the kitchen. I place the bottle on the kitchen counter and look around the dark house. I slowly paced myself as I entered the living room. I grabbed the remote on the coffee table and turn on the stereo system plugged in. As music fills the empty house I turn it up louder and louder until I can no longer hear my thoughts. I swayed left and right laughing as the beat picked up and I sung along. I didn’t sound good but I was trying! I bobbed my head as I walked out of the living room with a pep in my step. I stopped and did a little “cha cha” step as I laughed loudly. I paused my movement when my eyes locked with the glowing beauty outside. I turned the volume of the music even louder so that I could hear the music from where I was headed. The remote slipped from my fingers as I moved mesmerized by the sight.

                I slipped my top off and dropped it somewhere on the ground. I took more steps forward as I fumbled taking off my shorts. I removed both socks and by the time I did I was leaning against the backdoor. I remembered my purpose for coming downstairs. I walked to the cupboard and pulled down the first alcoholic bottle I could reach. I couldn’t even read the label but at this point I didn’t care. I opened the back door tripped over my feet a little. The cold winter breeze immediately hit me. I laughed as I mischievously eyed the glowing pool in front of me.

                I could still hear the loud music blasting and I laughed so hard that I cried. My laughter turned to tears. Tears of sadness. I want Damon. I want his love. As the cold air nipped at my skin I couldn’t find myself to care. I brought the bottle into my vision and used all my force to pull the top off. My first try was a failure. I put the bottle under my arm and pulled the top and it burst open with a pop. A giggle slipped from my mouth. I took a nice long swig from the bottle after all the foam went everywhere.

                I placed the bottle down and walked to the edge of the pool. This water is probably freezing, I thought. But then images of Sean and the miscarriage and Damon being taken kept crowding my mind. I couldn’t make it stop. I couldn’t make the bad thoughts go away. I felt my body still and a single tear escaped my eye and slid down my cheek. I wanted the thoughts to go away. That’s all I wanted…

                I remember taking a step forward and closing my eyes. I imagined kissing Damon. Yeah…kissing Damon. Feeling his soft lips against mine. I felt a thousand needles stick into my body as coldness surrounded me. I sunk below and I lost all control of my body as I stopped moving my arms. I slowly floated to the top and I gasped for air as I pushed my hair back. I let myself float on my back as I stared at the empty dark sky. The water was freezing but it made my body numb so I didn’t mind.