Falling for red

{35} Past

"He grips her, hits her, blames her. They hear sirens approaching only making him angrier. He beats her so hard she's falling into unconsciousness and guess what her water breaks.

She has a c-section before going into a coma. It seems like she couldn't hold on any longer because she passed away in her coma. Their father left to start a new life without them. Leaving her twelve year old and new born to battle the world all alone. 

The twelve year olds name is," Don't say it. Please don't say it. "Carson. And the new born was me."

His words lingered in the air creating a heavy silence as I thought about what to say. I mean there wasn't anything I could say to make him feel any better. I just scanned his face, looking for something except I don't know what I was looking for. 

Maybe a sign that he was alright. But all I saw in return was a stone cold face that didn't reveal any of his emotions. The only thing I could gather was that he was angry by the ragged breaths leaving his lips and clenched jaw.

I let one of my hands rest on the side of his neck, my thumb brushing over his jawline. 

"How do you feel?"

"What the fuck is this? Therapy?" He spat out.

"Sorry. Wrong thing to say," I whispered not trying to disrupt the morbid peace we had created.

"No I'm sorry for being a prick. You were only being nice. What else was I to expect from you after I told you all of that?"

"Don't worry about it." In the heat of the moment we tend to say things we don't mean. Besides he could've said something way worse.

I watched as he took deep breaths, his jaw unclenching slowly.

"I just hate everything about it. I hate that my mother took him back so many times. I hate that Carson had to go through all of that. But most of all I hate that I didn't get to meet her. My mom." His voice broke and in that moment my heart ached for him. He was dealt a shitty hand in life and there was nothing he could do about it.

"I'm proud of you, you know? You went through so many tragedies before your life even began. And look where you are now."

"Yeah I went to juvie. Not much to be fucking proud of," he said with malice.

"Nope. I'm not having none of that. You grew up without your parents and you turned out amazing. Along the way you made a family, a good one at that. Sure they may not be blood but their still your family. I bet it's ten times better than the one you would've had with that father of yours," I said spitting out the word father viciously. "So yes I'm proud of you." I leaned down leaving a tiny kiss on his forehead.

"Your heaven sent Red." 

I rolled my eyes. "You're so overdramatic."

"Seriously, I don't know what I'd be doing without you right now. I'm so glad I have you." I turned my head away not wanting him to see my misty eyes. If anything he was the heaven sent one. He's helped me more then he'll ever know. 

He reached up and pulled my face back. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing. Everything's perfect." He just continued to fix me with his stare.

"It's just... That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me," I squeaked out embarrassed. He smirk at my obvious discomfort while I felt my face get hotter. My eye roamed around the room as I hoped he would ignore my flushed cheeks.

"You look cute when you blush. In fact you look cute when your face is red in general." 

I groaned in annoyance. "I'm not cute," I said distastefully.

"That's why I fought with you all the time," he added. My eyes snapped back in his direction as my jaw dropped. 

"Don't want to catch flies," he teased, closing my mouth with two of his fingers.

"So your trying to tell me you riled me up just to see me blush," I clarified, still slightly shocked.

"Well not just for that. I enjoyed pissing you off. But that was one of my main reasons." 

"Prick," I scoffed, pushing his head of my lap. But apparently I pushed with too much force as he rolled off the couch and onto the floor. It was silent for a total of ten seconds before I burst out laughing.

"So much for this not being therapy," I teased before he pulled me down with him. We laid side by side watching the darkness swoop over the sky like a blanket. 

There was one thing I was craving that would make this perfect. We both snapped our heads to each other saying, "Milkshakes!" 

I guess great, hungry, minds really do think alike.