The Dawn of Autumn

The Upside of Love

Chapter 25:

The Upside of Love

Love was a very strange, but very splendored thing. All Emily had been able to think about since the evening by the fireplace was the look on Alison's face when they connected. The look in her eyes was something Emily had never seen before. In that moment it felt like Alison was a part of her, like she was in her veins. It was like chasing a natural high better than drugs and alcohol combined.

She'd had sex before, but she'd never connected like that with Maya or Isaac. It was the same for Alison. Though the blonde had never gone beyond anything oral with her partners it had been more about the pleasure than about the connection. But with Emily she felt something stir in her soul. Despite the fact that it was their first time, Alison had gotten a sense that their hearts had been linked in another lifetime, like they'd been meant to be together. They belonged.

There was a quiet moment afterwards when they'd peered into each other's eyes. They'd laid their bodies bare, but the most intimate act was the fact that they had laid their souls bare. And it was in looking into each other that they saw themselves in the other's soul. They fit together with all of their broken and incomplete pieces, and they made each other whole. They knew what they had was special.

They both felt different after that night. Everything felt more intense...more vivid and colorful. Emily had even been carrying herself differently, though she didn't realize it until she got back to school. Hanna had watched the way Alison and Emily interacted at breakfast. She called attention to it when they were alone later.

"You two totally had sex." She had grinned. She had practically been able to see it radiating off of Emily.

Every time Emily looked at Alison she found something else about her to be attracted to. She saw Alison eyeing her the same way. The experience had shifted something in their relationship in the best way.

Now, Emily was trying to channel that into words. She pulled her pen away from the paper she was scribbling on. She chewed on the pen cap with a smile on her face as she thought back on that night fondly. Their kisses. Their touches. Their highs. Their love.

She felt like a giggly awkward kid in love, and she realized...she was. She loved Alison. She loved her. She was in love with her. That night had been nothing but a storybook of shared moments of crazy insatiable desire. They fed their appetites several times after the first time. Emily could have gone all night. Alison, too. But there was something about the way they felt after the heightened pleasure that enveloped them in a blanket of comfort and warmth that made them want to bathe in the afterglow. It was in the way that Emily held Alison. It was in the way that Alison peppered her belly with kisses. It was in the way they were together.

It wasn't so much about the physicality of it. It was the shared intimacy. Neither one of them had ever opened themselves up like that before. It was a pure need to feel their souls intertwine when they were together.

She had only cared about Alison's pleasure. She hadn't been focused on her own, which in turn had made it so much more impactful when she had felt herself floating along with Alison. They had been perfect together. The love between them was unmatched.

She thought she'd been in love with Maya, but when they fooled around it had always felt more about hormones and lust. Emily understood the difference now. She'd never really understood why older people referred to sex as "making love" but after that night with Alison she got it. And she embraced it. Because it was the most amazing feeling in the world.

It was a love so consuming that it burrowed into a part of Emily that she didn't even know existed. It was a little daunting. Emily wasn't someone who was intimidated very easily. She'd always been her father's daughter. Tough, but kind. Fearless, but firm. But everything about her brain chemistry felt like it was changing. She wasn't sure if it was the pregnancy or the fact that she was head-over-heels for Alison.