Ink Stains (MCYT Oneshots)

Forget-Me-Nots (DreamXD & Tommy)

(A/N: okay this is not a request, but this is a pretty... weird chapter? not sure how to describe it. all you need to know is that it's a vague god au, takes place during the prison arc, and tommy doesn't have the best of mental healths in here.)

"Of all the flowers you picked, I knew you would forget," Exdee sang, their voice a low but soothing sound that calmed the fire in Tommy's blood.

Exdee held up a blue flower to the sky, its petals flying off the bud of the flower one by one. They watched quietly, and sang the final notes of the song.

"Forget-me-nots."

The song didn't end in a loud scream like Tommy was expecting. Instead, it ended softly, almost tiredly. It ended with a whisper.

Would that happen to him too?

"What are you thinking about?" Exdee asked him, changing positions so the god was floating in front of his face. "Wanna spill?"

"How do you continue to love him?" Tommy asked, eyes watching the final petal drift into the ocean. Exdee's smile froze, and for a moment, the world seemed to be at a standstill.

Exdee sighed, knowing who he was referring to. "I don't."

"Then why do you help him?" Tommy couldn't help the bitterness in his voice. "You know what he's done to me and everyone else. You know what he will do. You know what he's doing. So why do you still love him?"

Exdee sighed. "Same reason why you still love your family, hmm?"

And that-

Tommy couldn't give a good answer to that. Exdee wasn't done, though, because they continue talking.

"Plus, I'm not the same kind of deity as you," Exdee poked his forehead, snickering lightly at the face he probably made. "Not all of us have an ultra-mega-powerful parent to help us in life, y'know?"

"Doesn't seem like she's doing much right now," Tommy murmured, curling into himself. The sea far down looked so tempting, but that part of Tommy was locked tightly away, shoved into the back of a metaphysical cabinet.

Tommy wasn't that boy anymore. It didn't stop him from feeling like he was.

Exdee sighed, again. Tommy wondered if that sort of sighing came with being an old god. "Look, kid. Charis cares about you, but there's a whole lot behind the scenes that you know nothing about. She's just trying to keep you safe, and frankly, I'm not inclined to stop her."

Tommy sat in silence. He didn't think at all; he didn't want to make complex thoughts at that moment.

"She cares for you the same way that Soot brother of yours used to care for you. There's really not much that Charis wouldn't do for you."

Tommy opened his hand, and let a small forget-me-not bloom from his palm. "I guess."

"Really. You have to believe me."

The forget-me-not was crushed under his palm, and Tommy felt a little bad at the sick satisfaction it brought him. "That's what Phil said. That's what Dream said. I'm done with being mani- with being made to think that people care when they don't. I don't believe you."

A hand brushed back his hair, and Tommy let the petals in his hand float down, the vibrant blue petals eventually blending in with the colour of the sea below them.

"Do you really think that, Tommy?"

If he closed his eyes and tried hard enough, he could almost pretend that someone was hugging him, that someone was patting his hair and soothing his worries and just-

If he tried hard enough, he could almost pretend that someone truly loved him.

"Maybe," Tommy whispered. "Maybe I do. Who would prove me wrong, anyways?"

"I could name a few names," Exdee offered. Tommy shook his head.

"No thanks," he muttered. "I don't want- I don't need your pity."

"As if I'd give out my pity so easily," Exdee sounded affronted, even as they moved positions to once again be floating next to Tommy. "I don't tell anything but the truth; you know that already."

"The only truth that you have is in your fucking words," Tommy replied scathingly, digging his fingers into his palms. "Actions speak louder than words. I've learned that already."

"Well, it's quite the wrong lesson."

"Is it now?" Tommy snorted, turning away. Memories flashed through his mind, memories of war and violence and belittlement ran through his brain. "I can think of many events that will prove you wrong there."

For once, Exdee didn't have a comeback. Good.

"I'll have to head back into that prison soon," Tommy spoke up eventually, after a long while of silence. His hands came to rest on the edges of the cobblestone beneath him, and he felt as the stone blossomed roses and leaves. "How long has it been, by the way?"

"Three days," Exdee replied. "Would you like me to tell-"

"No need," Tommy sighed. He already knew about how his friends all left him behind, left him to rot and disappear besides the only person he truly hated. Even then, that last part was still a lie. "I already know. I guess this is goodbye?"

"The gods are always watching," Exdee murmured. There were no traditional goodbyes between gods.

The goodbye felt like condemnation.

"I know," Tommy responded softly.