Wait For Me

41 | our first time

❝ 𝑰'𝒎 𝒏𝒆𝒘 𝒕𝒐 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒂𝒇𝒇𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏
𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝑰'𝒎 𝒈𝒐𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒅𝒊𝒓𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏,
𝒇𝒍𝒐𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒉𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉 𝒅𝒊𝒇𝒇𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒅𝒊𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒔𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔
𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒍𝒐𝒔𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒔𝒆𝒏𝒔𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒓𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒈𝒊𝒐𝒏,
𝒉𝒐𝒏𝒆𝒚, 𝑰 𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒈𝒐𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏
𝑰'𝒎 𝒔𝒐 𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆𝒅 𝒃𝒚 𝒚𝒐𝒖, 𝒊𝒕 𝒉𝒖𝒓𝒕𝒔 ❞

𝑲𝒉𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒅

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* NOTE - this is a double update. Please read chapter 40 if you haven't already before reading this one. ALSO please read my authors note at the end. Thank you, I hope you enjoy this one. *

Warning: this chapter contains sexual content.

T H E A

Somehow I managed to find myself at Rio's house this morning.

His brother and sister are staying around family friends so he's alone this weekend so that he can get on top of things with the tattoo parlour and just have some time for himself.

I've been here for the majority of the day, helping him organise the house and get things in order. Honestly I'm just happy to be doing anything other than thinking about what happened yesterday with Ricky.

Figuring out whether or not I should tell him has been driving me crazy and I'm still no closer to making a decision.

If I tell him, he might see me differently. What hid he gets mad and kicks me out? What if he becomes angry and tells me that he 'told me so.' Or what if he just straight up tells me that whatever have between us is done?

I know it sounds crazy and I know that I'm overthinking this ridiculous amounts, but I've been manipulated so much in the past, I've been put down time and time again, I've been ridiculed, made to feel like everything is my fault.

What if Rio doesn't believe me? What if he thinks I was the one who initiated it?

Oh god. I'm going to end up driving myself insane with all these different possible scenarios which are probably extremely far fetched, but I still can't help but feel as though they could actually happen.

He returns into his bedroom, fresh from his shower and only wearing a pair of boxers when he stops in his tracks, clearly sensing that somethings wrong. "Hey, what's up?" He asks and I glance up at him, wiping my eye with the back of my hand. "Thea, what's wrong? Why are you crying?"

I scoff to myself, almost just wanting to punch my own face at how stupid I'm being. I don't even know why I'm crying.

He walks over to me, putting down the towel he was using to dry his hair and cups the side of my face with both of his hands, forcing me to look up at him. "Tell me what's wrong." He says softly.

"You'll hate me," I mumble and his dark brows furrow with confusion.

"What? I could never hate you Thea," he replies quickly as his thumb gently traces back and forth on my cheek. "Please just tell me what's wrong, I don't like seeing you like this."