Listening To My Heart - Poetry/Lyrics

Poem 29 {Let Me Go

A cold ripple runs through this numb body yet again.

My body goes back to lying dead still,

And yet again the thought of death intrigues me,

I want it.

It seems to be the only thing I want

Staring at the black hole in front of me,

It reflects everything of me;

Dark and bland.

I curl into my ball and lay still, lifeless.

I look at my skin, the whiteness and neglect,

I've neglected everything.

My lips are unreachable,

My smile has deserted me

As has everyone else.

I rock back and forth my eyes clenched tight,

I don't know what I want and why I am here,

Except I want to feel pain,

I want to feel.

I wince inwards as I reflect on my scars

And the burning salt comes tearing down my face,

Blanketing me.

I try to scream and shout but my vocal chords are frayed.

I'm passed the stage of curling up in a ball and crying myself to sleep.

I can't scream, I can't kick.

I want to go up to every last person that 'loves' me,

And rip them to bits, cause

I'm not okay!

But stop asking me if I'm okay!

Leave me alone!

Let me waste away, let death carry me away.

Let me be free oh cause I'm over this life,

I'm over this numbness and I'm sick of this riddle.

Just let me go cause I don't want to know,

And I don't care.

This is the end.

I just want to melt into these cold sheets,

 And I want to be released.

Just please let me go.

Please.

I stare at this black hole and think,

Please just let me be.

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