The October Amaryllis

Chapter 26 - May 19th, 2020 - 8:10 A.M.

A part of me was tempted to time travel out of the doctor's office; in fact, it took everything to escape the temptation. It would have been so easy to do, but the risks would have far outweighed it. The poor guy would have needed his own hospitalization if he saw me vanishing into thin air. I swear the more I time-traveled, the more reckless I became. It was almost like a pseudo drug addiction of a sort, and time travel was my drug. At this rate, I would end up in bat country in a week.

"Clive, are you paying attention?" the doctor said, snapping his pointer finger right in front of my eyes. I dissociated from the current moment once again. At that moment, all I could think about was how much wrong I had done in so little time; it was almost impressive, actually. If there were an award for the biggest disappointment of the year, I'm sure I would have won first place.

"Yes, sorry, I just feel really terrible right now," I said, groaning. Whatever mania I may have had due to time travel had crashed below sea level into the Marianas Trench.

"I understand. Your urine test came back, and it's negative for everything. I'm not a psychiatrist, but your symptoms seem very reminiscent of bipolar I; as a result, they will most likely prescribe you antipsychotics in the hospital. Speaking of the hospital, an ambulance will pick you up in about two hours, and they will drive you to St. Clara. If you're like most people there, you will have a roommate of the same gender. Do you have any questions for me?" he asked, straightening his glasses.

"Yes, do antipsychotics help with hallucinations? I've seen ah... strange things," I said, trying to be as careful as possible with my words. I worried he'd permanently send me to St. Clara's if I were more direct.

"Yes, they will; if you're okay with it, would you explain exactly what you see?" he asked, getting a clipboard and a pen.

"I see historical events out of the corner of my eye that disappear as soon as I directly look at them. They're completely random and seem to happen spontaneously, almost. They're more annoying than anything, and I can ignore them if I put enough effort into it. Still, I figured it would be important to tell you this. Do you think you could help me fix my brain?" I asked, practically pleading. I hated that I couldn't tell him the real reason I was experiencing all the hallucinations. In fact, at that moment, I had hated myself; I felt like I was more than worthless. I almost wished I was dead because of how stressful the situation was.

"I'm very thankful that you told me all of this, but unfortunately, I'm not qualified enough to tell you what I think is happening to your brain. In fact, there has never been an official explanation as to the cause of hallucinations. Well... that is all that I wanted to talk to you about. Oh, wait, I believe your father is about to visit you right about now!" he said, looking down at his watch and taking the clipboard with him out of the room.

Oh, yes, I almost forgot I saved a certain somebody...