Our first week of living together was everything I hoped so far. I know we will have our hard days, but right now I wanted to enjoy the "honeymoon stage" for as long as possible. The feeling of waking up next to him every morning and knowing he wasn't going anywhere filled my heart with peace.
"Good morning" I kissed his chest and up to his neck.
"Mmm good morning" he said quietly, still waking up. He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me onto of him before closing his eyes and drifting back to sleep.
"Andrew" I whispered, "we have to get ready."
His eyes fluttered.
"Andrew!" I laughed, "wake up!"
He opened his eyes and stretched out, "what time is it?"
"Ten"
He groaned, "okay, I'm getting up."
I sat against my head board and pulled the sheets up to cover myself. Andrew rolled over to face me and pulled the covers down.
"Andrew!" I shouted and pulled the covers back up. "Get up!"
"You get up first" he pulled the blankets back down.
"Fine" I laughed and climbed out of bed. Andrew sat up against the headboard and watched as I got dressed.
"You know, I wouldn't be so tired of you let me go to sleep when I wanted to" he pointed out.
I gave him a sly grin, "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Don't play dumb with me Miller, you knew exactly what you were doing last night" he tossed a pillow.
I threw it back, "oh, don't act so innocent Pierce!"
Andrew caught the pillow and smiled. I started pulling my hair into a pony tail, "I thought I could make you breakfast before we leave for my mom's."
"You did?" he was incredulous.
I rolled my eyes, "put your clothes on and let's go!"
Andrew quickly dressed into his usual jeans and black t-shirt. It almost made me mad how he literally rolled out of bed and looked as gorgeous as he always does. We walked out and headed to the kitchen.
"Sit" I pointed to the counter.
"Oh really?" Andrew laughed, but hopped onto the counter anyways. "So what's for breakfast?"
"It's my specialty" I said grabbing bagels and cream cheese from the refrigerator.
"Bagels is your specialty?" he laughed.
"They way I make them, yes!" I assured and grabbed avocado. I sliced the bagels and dropped them in the toaster, then began cutting the avocado.
"So what time do we need to leave to make it to your mom's?" Andrew asked as he watched me work.
"By twelve at the latest, so we can be there to help set up" I answered. My mom is having her Christmas Eve-Eve party again now that her and Peter have settled into their new home. I was pretty happy she decided to host again. It felt like another thing that was getting back to normal.
"I can't believe he's finally proposing"
"Yeah took him long enough" I added sarcastically. Andrew looked down at his hands for a moment.
"What's wrong?" I asked as I put myself between his legs and wrapped my arms around his waist.
"How long should he have waited?" he asked thoughtfully.
"I don't know, I thought he should of married her when I saw how great she is" I answered.
"When was that?"
"Um, that first Christmas, actually. The day after my mom's party."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. Scott and I were fighting, she helped me make sense of it all. And I remember thinking, Caleb better marry this girl!"
"What were you fighting about?"
"Um, well... you actually" I confessed and grabbed the bagels from the toaster. "Do you like a little cream cheese or a lot?"
"Even amount?" he smiled. I continued to work on breakfast when he finally asked "why were you guys fighting about me?"
I set the butter knife down and looked at him, "Scott was jealous of you. He um, said he noticed the way you looked at me."
"Oh, and Jenny helped you?"
"Yeah, I told her Scott was crazy and she said maybe he wasn't so crazy" I looked down at the counter. I felt guilty now that I realized Scott wasn't wrong.
"Wait, what did she say exactly?" Andrew seemed worried.
"I don't know, that was six years ago" I shrugged and started adding avocado on top of the bagels.
"Casey" he annunciated my name the way he always does when he knows I'm not being completely honest.
I huffed, "she just said that things aren't always what they seem and I shouldn't compare the way you looked at Leah with the way you looked at me, which I guess she was right about."
Andrew slid off the counter, "I'm sorry" he said quietly as he shoved his hands in his pockets.
"Why are you apologizing?"
"I never meant to cause you and Scott to fight, and knowing you, you are feeling guilty because he was right."
"Okay" I tossed my hands up, "how do you keep doing that?"
"Doing what?" he furrowed his brows.
"You seem to always know what I'm thinking, it drives me crazy. I never know what you're thinking."
He smiled but still looked nervous, "I just know that's what you do."
"Well yes, I do feel guilty, you have nothing to apologize for" I leaned over and gave him a quick kiss before finishing up our breakfast. I just needed to add some seasoning and they are done.
"Do you ever wanna get married?" Andrew asked. I realized I haven't thought about it since I decided I never would marry. I was so focused on just how great it felt not to be alone.
"Um, I don't know" I answered honestly.
"You haven't thought about, one day, maybe... we... would get... married?" he stammered.
"I uh— I mean I haven't really considered it"
"Oh" he looked defeated.
"I just thought that after Scott, I would never get married. I mean, we talked for years about it and the idea of marrying anyone else felt like betrayal" I explained.
"I understand" he smiled but it didn't meet his eyes. He looked hurt, before adjusting his features into a small smile. I handed him his plate, he thanked me and we sat down to eat.
"This is surprisingly good!" he complimented.
"Yeah?" I was excited he liked something I made. "I usually buy these at a café near work, so I learned to make them myself!"
"That's impressive. I honestly thought that when you said 'make me breakfast' you were going to make me a bowl of cereal" he teased.
"You always cook, so I just wanted to surprise you with something" I smiled.
"I love it Case, it was very thoughtful" he leaned over and kissed me on the cheek.
We finished breakfast quietly. Andrew didn't seem as happy as he was earlier. I think the marriage conversation got to him. I was suddenly reminded of a conversation Andrew and I had years ago, when Scott was deployed.
He mentioned how he had hoped to marry Leah one day. I don't think I realized how disappointed he probably felt when I told him I hadn't considered getting married after Scott passed away.
Once we finished eating, we packed Lola up and drove to my mom's house. Andrew kept the music up loud so I assumed he wasn't in the mood to talk much. I couldn't blame him. I need to find a time to discuss it with him. But for now, I just wanted to focus on getting through the holidays.
I was excited to see my mom and Peter. I haven't seen them since they left for their honeymoon. We FaceTimed a lot, but that's not the same.
"Hi sweetie!" she cheered like she always does when I visit. Her and Peter were outside when we pulled up.
"Hi mom" exclaimed and we both hugged.
"Hi Andrew! I'm so glad you are here" she pulled him into our hug.
"Hi Hannah!" Andrew softly greeted my mom.
Once she released us, my mom quickly bent down to rub Lola's belly while Peter gave me a hug, "hey kiddo!"
"Hi Peter! You guys look great after tanning it up on the beaches of Hawaii."
"Doesn't you're mom look beautiful?" he added, causing my mom to blush.
"Well come in guys!" My mom grabbed Lola's leash and we followed her in.
We were immediately greeted by the elaborate array of Christmas decorations, just like at our old house. "Wow mom, looks great!"
"You don't think I went a little overboard? I was so excited to have our party again, I just couldn't help myself" she explained.
"No, I think it's just the right amount of overboard for you" I teased.
Andrew and I helped set up the chairs and prep the food for tonight. He was still quiet and kept his distance, but we were pretty busy setting up, so I tried not to read into it. It didn't take long before people started showing up. I greeted guests so I can let them know to not go for the big gift on the table during the White Elephant game. That was part of Caleb's proposal plan and we had to make sure it all went smoothly.
"Hi Casey!" Jenny exclaimed with Caleb on her arm.
"Hi guys!" I cheered.
"Did my parents make it yet?" Caleb asked.
"Yes they are inside" I gestured behind me.
"And where's Andrew?" Jenny added.
"Um, he's somewhere inside" I answered.
She raised her brow, "everything okay?"
"I think so!" I sounded unsure.
"Come on, let's catch up" Jenny dragged me from the door to the hallway. "What's going on?" she asked once we were alone.
"I think Andrew may be upset with me" I decided to admit. There was no point in trying to hide it.
"I don't think you could do anything to piss Andrew off" she laughed.
"He asked if I would ever get married someday" I added in a serious tone.
"Oh" she stopped smiling. "What did you say?"
I shrugged, "I told him that I didn't really plan on it. After Scott, the idea just makes me feel guilty."
"That's a stupid reason Case" Jenny was blunt.
"Wow Jen, don't hold back" I retorted.
"I'm sorry" she retracted, "It's just— I don't know why Caleb hasn't asked me, I mean it's been over six years! And you're frustrated because Andrew would marry you right now if he could. It's all just, ugh!" she finished her rant.
I didn't say anything, more out of fear than anything else. Clearly this is a touchy subject for Jenny. One that she'll get over soon enough, but I wouldn't let her know that. I need to keep the focus on me so she won't get suspicious.
"Andrew and I have only been together for like a month, I can't think of marriage right now" I argued.
"Who cares? I mean you guys are living together after a month. Most people would think you're already crazy" she countered.
"Well I—" that was actually a good point, I realized.
"Casey, you gotta understand, Andrew waited years to marry Leah and then she pulled the rug out from under him. How long do you think he will stay if he knows, right out the gate, that you don't want to get married?"
Man she was good. I couldn't argue with her. I'm so thankful Caleb's gonna finally propose, cause if he didn't I would do it for him! "Thanks Jenny, that makes a lot of sense!" I admitted.
"Good, now let's go cause I'm starving!" she grabbed my arm and took me with her to find Caleb and Andrew. They were standing together talking. He looked so handsome in his black slacks and grey crew neck sweater. His black hair was left undone just how I like it. Whenever he tries to style his hair, I can't run my hands through it.
Whatever him and Caleb were talking about made him smile and my knees gave way when those dimples popped.
"You okay?" Jenny asked as I tried to correct my balance.
"Yup I'm good!" I assured.
Andrew must have noticed because in a second he was by my side. "What's wrong?" he sounded worried, his arm around my waist.
I stared up into his big browns eyes, taking in everything in this moment and I realized just how right Jenny was. My excuse for not wanting get married was just that, an excuse. I didn't want to feel guilty so I decided I just won't face it.
Andrew has stuck by me even when I tried my hardest to push him away. He wants to get married, then I will marry him in a heartbeat. I realize I had been staring at Andrew this whole time while coming to this revelation. "Casey?" He smiled, "what's going on?"
Wrapping my arms around his neck, I pulled him closer to me. I stood in my tippy toes and reached up to kiss him tenderly.
